Beautiful Disaster
by wcjess15
Summary: Story is based on the book Beautiful Disaster by Jamie McGuire with the substitution to SON Characters. Rating changes through out the story
1. Chapter 1

**So this story is based on the book 'Beautiful Disaster' by Jamie McGuire with the substitution to SON characters. I liked the book a lot and thought to share to through SON.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own neither SON or Beautiful Disaster the book**

**Ch.1 Red Flag **

Everything in the room screamed that I didn't belong. The stairs were crumbling, the rowdy patrons were shoulder to shoulder, and the air was medley of sweat, blood and mold. Voices blurred as they yelled numbers and names back and forth, and the arms flailed about, exchanging money and gestures to communicate over the noise. I squeezed through the crowd, following close behind my best friend.

"Keep your cash in your wallet, Spencer!" Kyla called to me. Her broad smile gleamed even in the dim light.

"Stay close! It'll get worse once it starts" Aiden yelled over the noise. Kyla grabbed his hand and then mine as Aiden led us through the sea of people.

The Sharp bleating of a bullhorn cut through the smoky air. The noise startled me, and I jumped in reaction, looking for the source of the blast. A man stood on a wooden chair, holding a wad of cash in one hand, the horn in the other. He held the plastic to his lips.

"Welcome to the bloodbath! If you are looking for Economics 101… you are in the wrong fucking place, my friend! If you seek the Circle, this is Mecca! My name is Adam. I make the rules and I call the fight. Betting ends once the opponents are on the floor. No touching the fighters, no assistance, no bet switching, and no encroachment of the ring. If you break these rules, you will get the piss beat out of you and you will be thrown out n your ass without your money! That includes you, ladies! So don't use your hoes to scam the system boys!"

Aiden shook his head "Jesus, Adam!" he yelled to the emcee over the noise, clearly disapproving of his friend's choice of words.

My heart pounded in my chest. With a pink cashmere cardigan and pearl earrings, I felt a schoolmarm on the beaches of Normandy. I promised Kyla that I could handle whatever we happen upon, but at ground zero I felt the urge to grip her toothpick of an arm with both hands. She wouldn't put me in any danger, but being in a basement with fifty or so drunken college boy's intent on bloodshed and capital, I wasn't exactly confident of our chances to leave unscratched.

After Kyla met Aiden at freshman orientation, she frequently accompanied him to the secret fights held in different basements of Eastern University. Each event was hosted in a different spot, and kept secret until just an hour before the fight.

Because I ran in somewhat tamer circle, I was surprised to learn of an underground world at Eastern; but Aiden knew about it before he had ever enrolled. Ashley, Aiden's roommate and cousin, entered her first fight seven months before. As a freshman, she was rumored to be the most lethal competitor Adam had seen in the three years since creating the Circle. Together Ashley and Aiden easily paid their rent and bills with the winnings.

Adam brought the bullhorn to his mouth once again, and the yelling and movement escalated to a feverish pace. "Tonight we have a new challenger! Easterns star varsity lacrosse player, Mia Young!"

Cheering ensued, and the crowd parted like the Red Sea when Mia entered the room. A circular space cleared, and the mob whistled, booed, and taunted the contender. She bounces up and down and rocked her neck back and forth, her face severe and focused, the crowd quieted to a dull roar, and my hands shot to my ears when music blared through the large speakers on the other side of the room.

"Our nets fighter doesn't need an introduction, but because she scared the shit outta me, I'll give her one, anyway! Shake in your boots, boys and drop your panties, ladies! I give you Ashley 'Devil' Davies!"

The volume exploded when Ashley appeared in a doorway across the room. She made her entrance, relaxed and unaffected. She strolled into the center of the circles as if she were showing up to another day at work. Lean muscle stretched under her skin as she popped her fist against Mia's knuckles. Ashley leaned in and whispered something in Mia's ear, and the lacrosse player struggles to keep her stern expression. Mia stood toe-to-toes with Ashley, and they looked directly into each other's eyes. Mia's expression was murderous; Ashley looked mildly amused.

They both took a step back and Adam sounded the horn. Mia took a defensive stance; and Ashley attacked. I stood on my tiptoes when I lost my line id sight, leaning from side to side to get a better view. I inched up sliding though the screaming crowd. Elbows jabbed into my side and shoulders rammed into me, bouncing me back and forth like a pinball. The tops of the fighters heads became visible so I continued to push my way forward.

When I finally reached the front, Mia grabbed Ashley with her thick arms and tried to throw her to the ground. When Mia leaned down with motion, Ashley rammed her knee into Mia's face. Before Mia could shake off the blow, Ashley lit into her, her fists making contact with Mia's bloodies face over and over.

Five fingers sank into my arm and I jerked back.

"What the hell are you doing, Spencer?" Aiden said

"I can't see from back there!" I called to him

I turned just in time to see Mia land a solid punch. Ashley turned, and for a moment I taught she had dodged another blow, but she made a complete circle, crashing her elbow straight into the center of Mia's nose. Blood sprayed my face, and splattered down the front of my cardigan. Mia fell to the concrete floor with a thud, and for a brief moment the room was completely silent.

Adam threw a scarlet square of fabric onto Mia's limp body, and the mob detonated. Cash change hands once again, and the expressions divided into the smug and the frustrated. I was pushed around with the movement of those coming and going. Kyla called my name from somewhere in the back, but I was mesmerized by the trail of red from my chest to my waist.

A pair of heavy black boots stepped in front of me, diverting my attention to the floor. My eyes traveles upwards; jeans spattered with blood, a set finely chiseled abs, chest drenched in sweat, and finally a pair of warm, brown eyes. I was shoved from behind, and Ashley caught me by the arm before I fell forward.

"Hey! Back up off her!" Ashley frowned, showing anyone who came near me. Her stern look expression melted into a smile at the sight of my shirt, and then she dabbed my face with a towel. "sorry about that, Pigeon.

Adam patted the back of Ashley's head. "C'mon Devil! You have some dough waitin' on ya"

Ashley's eyes didn't stray from mine. "It's a dam shame about the sweater. It looks good on you" in the next moment she was engulfed by fans, disappearing the way she came.

"What were you thinking, you idiot?" Kyla yelled, yanking my arm

"I came here to see a fight, didn't i?" I said, smiling.

"you aren't even suppose to be here, Spencer" Aiden scolded.

"Neither is Kyla" I said

"She doesn't try to jump in the circle!" he frowned "let's go"

Kyla smiled at me and whipped my face, "you are such a pain in the ass, Spence. God, I love you!" she hooked her arm around my neck, and we made our way up the stairs and into the night. Kyla followed me into my dorm room and then sneered at my roommate, Kara. I immediately peeled off the bloody cardigan throwing it into the hamper.

"gross, where have you been?" Kara asked from her bed

I looked to Kyla, who shrugged. "nosebleed. You haven't seen one of Spencer's famous nosebleeds?"

Kara pushed up her glasses and shook her head.

"oh you will." She winked at me and then shut the door behind her. less than a minute later, my cell chimed. Per her usual, Kyla texted me seconds after we had said goodbye.

_Staying w Aid c u 2morrow ring queen_

I peeked at Kara, who watched me as if my nose would gush at any moment. "She was kidding" I said

Kara nodded with indifference and then looked down to the mess of books on her bedspread. "I'll alert the media" kara deadpanned, keeping her head down.

The next day, Aiden and Kyla joined me for lunch. I had intended to sit alone, but as students filtered into the cafeteria, the chairs around me were filled by either Aiden's frat brothers or members of the football team. Some of them had been at the fight, but no one mentioned my ringside experience.

"Aid," a passing voice called.

Aiden nodded, and Kyla and I both turned to see. Ashley took a seat at the end of the table. she was followed by the two voluptuous bottle blondes wearing Sigma Kappa Ts. One of them sat on Ashley's lap; the other sat beside her, pawing at her shirt.

"I think I just threw up a little in my mouth" kyla muttered

The blonde in Ashley's lap turned to Kyla "I heard that, skank"

Kyla grabbed her roll and threw it down the table, narrowly missing the girls face. Before the girl could say another word, Ashley let her knees give away, sending her stumbling to the floor.

"ouch!" she squealed, looking up at Ashley

"Kyla's a friend of mine, you need to find another lap, lex"

"Ash!" she whined scrambling to her feet

Ashley turned her attention to her plate, ignoring her. she looked at her sister and huffed and they left hand in hand. Ashley winked at Kyla, and as if nothing had happened, shoveled another bite into her mouth. It was then that I noticed a small cut on her eyebrow. She traded glances with Aiden and then began a conversation with one of the football guys across from her. Although the crows at the lunch table had thinned, Kyla, Aiden and I lingered to discuss our weekend plans. Ashley stood up to leave but stopped at out end of the table.

"what?" Aiden asked loudly, holding his had to his ear, I tried to ignore her for as long as possible, but when I looked up, Ashley was staring at me.

"you know her, Ash. Kyla's best friend? She was with us the other night" Aiden said

Ashley smiled at me in what I assumed was her most charming expression. She oozed sex and rebelliousness with her brown curly hair and tattooed forearm, and I rolled my eyes at her attempt to lure me in.

"Since when do you have a best friend Ky?" Ashley asked

"Since junior year" she answered, pressing her lips together as she smiled in my direction "don't you remember, Ashley? You ruined her sweater."

Ashley smiled "I ruin a lot of sweaters"

"Gross," I muttered

Ashley spun the empty chair beside me and sat, resting her arms in front of her, "so you're the Pigeon, huh?"

"no" I snapped. "I have a name"

She seemed amused at the way I regarded her, which only served to anger to make me angrier.

"well? What is it?" she asked

I took a bite of the last apple spear on my plate, ignoring her.

"pigeon its is then" she said shrugging

I glanced up at Kyla and then turned to Ashley. "I'm trying to eat here."

Ashley settled in for the challenge I presented, "my name is Ashley. Ashley Davies"

I rolled my eyes "I know who you are:

"you do huh?" Ashley said raising her wounded eyebrow

"don't flatter yourself, it's hard not to notice when fifty drunks are chanting your name."

Ashley sat up a bit taller, "I get that a lot" I rolled my eyes again and Ashley chuckled "Do you have a twitch?"

"a what?"

"A twitch, your eyes keep wiggling around" she laughed again when I glared at her. "those are some amazing eyes though" she said leaning just inches from my face "what color is that anyway? Blue?"

I looked down to my plate, letting the long strands of my blonde hair create a curtain between us. I didn't like the way it made me feel when she was so close. I didn't want to be like the scores of the other girls at Eastern that blushed in her presence. I didn't want her to affect me in that way at all.

"Don't even think about it Ashley, She's like my sister" Kyla warned

"Baby" Aiden said "you just told her no, she is never going to stop now"

"You're not her type" she hedge

Ashley feigned offense "I'm everyone's type!"

I peeked over at her and smiled

"ah! A smile. I'm not a rotten bastard after all," she winked. "it was nice to meet you, Pidge." she walked around the table and leaned into Kyla's ear.

Aiden threw a French fry at his cousin "get your lips outta my girl's ear, Ash!"

"Networking! I'm just networking!" Ashley walked backward whit her hands up in an innocent gesture.

A few more girls followed behind her giggling and running their fingers through their hair to get her attention, She opened the door for them and they nearly squealed in delight.

Kyla Laughed "oh, no. you're in trouble, Spence"

"what did she say" I asked, wary

"she wants you to bring her to the apartment , doesn't she?" Aiden said. Ky nodded and he shook his head, "you're a smart girl, Spencer. I'm telling you now, if you fall for her shit and then end up getting mad at her, you cant take it out on me and Ky, all right?"

I smiled, "I wont fall for it , Aid. Do I look like one of the Barbie twins to you?"

"she wont fall for it" Kyla assured him, touching his arm

"this isn't my first rodeo, Ky. Do you k now how many times she's screwed things up for me because she one-nights the best friend? All of a sudden it's a conflict of interest to date me because its fraternizing with the enemy! I'm tellin' ya, Spence," he looked at me " don't tell Ky she cant come over or date me because you fall for Ash's line of BS. Consider yourself warned."

"Unnecessary but appreciated," I said, I tried to reassure Aiden with a smile, but his pessimism was driven by years of being burned by Ashley's endeavors.

Kyla waved, leaving with Aiden as I walked to my afternoon class I squinted in the bright sun, griping my backpack straps. Eastern was exactly what I hoped it would be, from the smaller classrooms to the unfamiliar faces. It was a new start for me; I could finally walk somewhere without the whispers of those who knew- or thought they knew- anything about me. I was as indistinguishable as any other wide eyed overachieving freshman on her way to class; no staring, no rumors, no pity or judgment. Only the illusion of what I wanted them to see; cashmere, non-nonsense Spencer Carlin.

I sat my backpack on the floor and collapsed into the chair, bending down to fish my laptop from my bag. When I popped up to set it on my desk, Ashley slid into the next desk.

"Good you can take notes for me" she said. She chewed on the pen in her mouth and smiled, undoubtedly at her most charming.

I shot a disgusted look at her, "you're not even in this class."

"the hell if I'm not. I usually sit up there," she said, nodding to the top row. A small group of girls staring at me, and I noticed an empty chair I n the center.

"I'm not taking notes for you." I said booting up my computer.

Ashley leaned so close that I could feel her breath on my cheek "I'm sorry… did I offend you in some way?" I sighed and shook my head "then whats the problem?"

I kept my voice low "I'm not sleeping with you, you should give up now"

A slow smile crept across her face before she spoke "I haven't asked you to sleep with me." her eyes drifted to the ceiling in thought "have i?"

"I'm not a Barbie twin or one of you little groupies up there," I said glancing at the girls behind you. "I'm not impressed with your tattoos and charm or your forced indifference, so you can stop the antics, okay?"

"okay, Pigeon." She was infuriatingly impervious to my rudeness. "whys don't you come over with Kyla tonight?" I sneered at her request, but she leaned closer. "I'm not trying to bag you. I just wanna hang out"

"bag me? how do you ever get laid talking like that?" Ashley burst into laughter, shaking her head. "just come over I won't eve flirt with you, I swear"

"I'll think about it"

Professor Chaney strolled in, and Ashley turned her attention to the front of the room. A residual smile lingered on her face, making her nose crinkle. The more she smiled, the more I wanted to hate her, and yet it was the very thing that made hating her impossible.

"who can tell me which president had a cross-eyed wife with a bad case of the uglies?" Chaney asked

"make sure you get that down,: Ashley whispered "I'm goig to need to know that for job interviews"

"shhh" I said typing Chaney's every word.

Ashley grinned and relaxed into her chair. As the hour progressed she alternated between yawning and leaning against my arm to look at my monitor. I made a concentrated effort to ignor her, but her proximity made it difficult. She picked at the clack leather band around her wrist until Chaney dismissed us.

I hurried out the door and down the hall. Just when I felt sure I was at a safe distance, Ashley Davies was at my side. "have you thought about it?" she asked, slipping on her sunglasses.

A petite brunette stepped in front of us, wide-eyes and hopeful "hey, Ashley" she lilted, playing with her hair. I pause recoiling from her sugary tone and then walked around her. I'd seen her before talking normally in the commons are of the girls dorm, morgan hall. Her tone sounded much more mature than and I wondered what it was about a toddlers voice she thought Ashley would fin appealing. She babbled in a higher octave for a bit longer until she was net to me once again.

Pulling a lighter from her pocket, she lit a cigarette and blew out a thick cloud of smoke. "where was i?" oh yea… you were thinking"

I grimaced, "what are you talking about?"

"Have you thought about coming over?"

"if I say yes, will you quit following me?"

She considered my stipulation and then nodded "yes"

"then I'll come over."

"when?"

I sighted. "tonight. I'll come over tonight."

Ashley smiled and stopped in her tracks "Sweet, see you then, Pidge," he called after me.

I rounded the corner to see Kyla standing with Carmen outside our dormitory. The three of us ended up at the same table at freshman orientation, and I k new she would be the welcome third wheel to our well oiled machine. She wasn't excessively tall, but she towered my five feet four inches. Her rounded eyes offset her lon, lean features and her raven black hair was straight.

"Ashley Davies? Jesus Spencer, since when did you start fishing in the deep end?" Carmen said with disapproving.

Kyla pulled the gum from her mouth in a long strin. "you're only making it worse by brushing her off. She is not used to that"

"What do you suggest, I do? sleep with her?"

Kyla shrugged "it'll save time"

"I told her I'd come over tonight"

Carmen and Kyla traded glances.

"what? She promised to quit bugging me if I said yes. You're going over there tonight, right?"

"Well yeah" Kyla said. "you're really coming?"

I smiled and walked past them into the dorms, wondering if Ashley would make good on her promise not to flirt. She wasn't hard to figure out; she either saw me as a challenge or a safely unattractive enough to be a good friend. I wasn't sure which bothered me more.

Four Hours later, Kyla knocked on my door to take me to Aiden and Ashley's. she didn't hold back when I walked into the hall "Yuck, Spence! You look homeless"

"Good" I said smiling at my essemble. My hair was piled on top of my head in a messy bun. I had scrubbed the makeup from my face and replaced my contacts with rectangular black rimed glasses. Sporting ratty T-shirt and sweatpants, I shuffled along in a pair of flip-flops. The idea had come to me hours before that either way, unattractive was the best plan. Ideally, Ashley would be instantly turned off and stop her ridiculous persistence if I was looking for a buddy, I was aiming for too homely to be seen with.

Kyla rolled down her window and spit her gum "you're so obvious, why didn't you just roll in dog shit o make your outfit complete?"

"I'm not trying to impress anyone." I said

"obviously"

We pulled into the parking lot of Aiden's apartment complex, and followed Kyla to the stairs. Aiden opened the door, laughing as I walked in. "what happened to you?"

"she's trying to be unimpressive." Kyla said.

Kyla followed Aiden into his room. The door closed and I stood alone, feeling out of place. I sat in the recliner closest to the door and kicked off my flip-flops.

Their apartment was more aesthetically pleasing than the typical bachelor pad. The predictable posters of half-naked women and stolen street signs were on the walls, but it was clean, the furniture was new, and the smell of stale beer and dirty clothes was notably absent.

"its about time you showed up" Ashley said collapsing onto the couch

I smiled and pushed my glasses up the bridge of my nose, waiting for him to recoil at my appearance "kyla had a paper to finish"

"speaking of papers, have you started the one for history yet?"

He didn't bat an eye at my messy hair, I frowned at his reaction "have you?"

"I finished it this afternoon"

"its not dues until next Wednesday" I said surprised

"ii just plugged it out, how hard can a two page essay on Grant be?"

"im a procrastinator, I guess" I shrugged " I probably wont start until this weekend"

"well if you need help, just let me know"

I waited for her to laugh or to show some sign that she was joking, but her expression was sincere. I raised an eyebrow.

"you're going to help me with my paper?"

"I have an A in that class" she said, a bit miffed at my disbelief.

"she has As in all her classes, she's a freakin genius. I hate her" Aiden said as he led Ky into the living room by the hand.

I watched as Ashley with a dubious expression and her eyebrows shot up "what? You don't think a girl covered in tats and that trades punches for a living can get the grades? I'm not in school because I have nothing better to do"

"Why do you have to fight at all then? Why didn't you try for scholarships? I asked

"I did I was awarded half my tuition, but there are books, living expenses and I gotta come up with the other half sometime. Im serious, Pidge. If you need help with anything just ask"

"I don't need your help. I can write a paper." I wanted to leave it at that. I should have left it at that but this new side of her she'd revealed gnawed at my curiosity. "you cant find something else to do for a living? Less-I don't know-sadistic?"

Ashley shrugged "its an easy way to make a buck, I cant make that much working at the mall"

"I wouldn't say easy if you are getting hit in the face"

"what? You worried about me?" she winked. I made a face and she chuckled. "I don't get hit that often. If they swing I move, its not that hard"

I laughed once :you act as is no one else has come to that conclusion"

"when I throw a punch, they take it and try to reciprocate. That's not gonna win the fight"

I rolled my eyes "what are you, the karate kid? Where did you learn to fight?

Aiden and Kyla glanced at each other and then their eyes wandered to the floor. It didn't take long to recognize I has said something wrong.

Ashley didn't seem affected. "I had a mom with a drinking problem and a bad temper, and four older brothers that carried the asshole gene."

"oh" my ears smoldered

"don't be embarrassed, Pidge. Mom quit drinking, the brothers grew up."

"I'm not embarrassed" I fidgeted with the falling strands of my hairs the decided to pull it out and smooth it into another bun, trying to ignore the awkward silence.

"I like the au naturel thing you have going on, girls don't come over here like that"

"I was coerced into coming here, it didn't occur to me to impress you" I said irritated that my plan had failed.

She smiled her nose crinkle smile and I turned up my anger notch, hoping it would cover my unease. I didn't know how most girls felt around her but I've seen how they behaved. I was experiencing more of a disoriented, nauseated feeling than giggly infatuation, and the harder she worked to make me smile, the more unsettled I felt.

"I'm already impressed, I don't normally have to beg girls to come to my apartment."

"I'm sure" I said screwing my face into disgust.

She was the worst kind of confident. Not only was she shamelessly aware of her appeal, she was so used to women throwing themselves at her that she regarded my cool demeanor as refreshing instead of an insult. I would have to change my strategy.

Kyla pointed the remote at the television and switched it on "there's a good movie tonight, Anyone want to find out where baby jane is?"

Ashley stood up "I was just heading out for dinner, you hungry, Pidge?"

"I already ate" I shrugged

"No you haven't" kyla said before realizing her mistake. "oh…er…that's right, I forgot you grabbed a…pizza? Before we left"

I grimaced at her miserable attempt to fix her blunder, and then waited for Ashley's reaction

She walked across the room and opened the door "c'mon you've gotta be hungry"

"where are you going?"

"wherever you want, we can hit a pizza place"

I looked down at my clothes "im not really dressed"

She appraised me for a moment and then grinned "you look fine, lets go. Im starving"

I stood up and waved to kyla, passing Ashley to walk down the stairs. I stopped in the parking lot, watching in horror as she straddled a matte black motorcycle.

"uh…" I trailed off, scrunching my exposed toes. she shot an impatient glare in my direction

"oh get on. I'll go slow"

"what is that?" I asked reading the writing on the gas tank too late.

"it's a Harley Night Rod. She's the love of my life, so don't scratch the paint when you get on"

"im wearing flip-flops!"

Ashley stared at me as if I's spoken a foreign language "I'm wearing boots. Get on"

she slipped on her sunglasses and the engine snarled when she brought it to life. I climbed on and reached behind me for something to grab on to, but my fingers slipped from the leather to the plastic cover of the taillight.

Ashley grabbed my wrists and wrapped them around her waist. "there's nothing to hold on to but me, Pidge. Don't let go" she said pushing the bike backwards with her feet. With a flick of her wrist, she pulled onto the street and we took off like a rocket. The pieces of my hair slung loose beat against my face and I ducked behind Ashley, knowing I would end up with bug guts on my glasses if I looked over her shoulder.

She gunned the throttle when we pulled into the driveway of the restaurant and once she slowed to stop, I wasted no time scrambling to the safety of the concrete.

"you're a lunatic!"

Ashley chuckled, leaning her bike onto its kickstand before dismounting "I went the speed limit"

"yeah, if we were on the autobahn!" I said pulling out my bun to separate the rats with my fingers.

Ashley watched me pull hair away from my face and then walked to the door, holding it open "I wouldn't let anything happen to you, pigeon"

I stormed past her into the restaurant, my head not quite in sync with my feet. Grease and herbs filled the airs as I followed her across the red, breadcrumb-speckled carpet. She chose a booth in the corner, away from the patches of students and families and then ordered two beers. I scanned the room, watching the parents coaxing their boisterous children to eat, and looking away from inquisitive glances of Eastern students.

"sure Ashley" the waitress said, writing down our drink orders. She looked a bit high from her presence as she returned to the kitchen.

I tucked the windblown hair behind my ears, suddenly embarrassed by my appearance. "come here often?" I asked acerbically

Ashley leaned on the table with her elbows, her brown eyes fixated on mince. "so what's your story, Pidge? Are you a woman-hater in-general or do you just hate me?"

"I think its just you" I grumbled

She laughed once, amused at my mood, "I cant figure you out. You're the first girl that's ever been disgusted with me before sex. You don't get all flustered when you talk to me and you don't try to get my attention."

"its not a ploy; I just don't like you"

"you wouldn't be here if you didn't like me"

My frown involuntarily smoothed and I sighed "I didn't say you're a bad person, I just like being foregone conclusion for sole reason of having a vagina" I focused in the grains of salt on the table until I hear a choking noise from Ashley's direction.

Her eyes widen and she quivered with howling laughter. "oh my god! You're killing me! that's it. We have to be friends. I wont take no for an answer."

"I don't mind being friends, but that doesn't mean you have to try to get in my panties every five seconds"

"you're not sleeping with me. I get it"

I tried not to smile, but failed

Her eyes brightened. "you have my word. I wont even think about your panties…unless we want me to"

I rested my elbows on the table and leaned into them "and that wont happen, so we can be friends."

An impish grin sharpened her features as she leaned in a bit closer. "never say never"

"so whats your story?" I asked "have you always been Ashley 'Devil' Davies, or is that just since you came here?" when I said her nickname her confidence waned. She looked a bit embarrassed.

"no, Adam started that after my first fight."

Her short answers were beginning to bug me "that's it? You're not going to tell me anything about yourself?"

"what do you wanna know?"

"the normal stuff. where you from? What you want to be when you grow up…things like that?"

"I'm form here, born and raised and I'm a Criminal justice major"

With a sigh, she unrolled her silverware and straighten her plate, she looked over her shoulder, her jaw tense. Two tables seating the Eastern soccer team erupted in laughter and Ashley seemed to be annoyed at what they were laughing about.

"you're joking" I said in disbelief

"no, I'm a local" she said distracted

"I mean about your major. You don't look like the criminal justice type"

Her eyebrows pulled together, suddenly focused in our conversation "why?"

I scanned the tattoos covering her arm "I'll just say that you seem more criminal and less justice"

"I don't get in any trouble…for the most part. Mom was pretty strict"

"where was your dad?"

"he died when I was a kid" she said matter-fact.

"I'm…I'm sorry" I said shaking my head. Her answer caught me of guard

She dismissed my sympathy. "I don't remember him, my brothers do, but I was just three when he died."

"Four brothers, huh? How did you keep them straight?" I teased

"I kept them straight by who hit hardest, which also happened to be oldest to youngest. Thomas; the twins, Taylor and Tyler; and then Trenton. You never ever caught alone in a room with taylor and ty. I learned half of what I do in the Circle from them. Trenton was the smallest but he's fast. He's the only one that can punch on me now"

I shook my head, dumbfounded at the thought of Ashley's running around on one household. "do they all have tattoos?"

"pretty much, except thomas. He's an exec in California"

"and your mom where is she?"

"Around" she said. Her jaws were working again, increasingly irritated with the soccer team.

"What are they laughing about?" I asked, gesturing to the rowdy table. She shook her head, clearly not wanting to share. I crossed my arms and squirmed in my seat, nervous about what they were saying that caused her so much aggravation.

"tell me"

"they're laughing about me having to take you to dinner first. Its no usually….my thing"

"First?" when the realization settled on my face, Ashley winced at my expression. I spoke before I thought. "and I was afraid there were laughing about you being seen with me dressed like this, and they think I'm going to sleep with you" I grumbled

"why wouldn't I be seen with you?"

"what were we talking about?" I asked, warding off the heat rising in my cheeks.

"you, whats your major?" she asked

"oh,er…General Ed, for now. Im still undecided, but I, leaning towards accounting."

"you're not a local, though. You must be a transplant."

"Wichita. Same as Kyla"

"How did you end up here form Ohio?"

I picked at the label of my beer bottle "We just had to get away?"

"from what?"

"my parents"

"oh, what about Kyla? She has parents issues too?"

"no, Mark and Pam are great, they practically raised me. she sort of tagged along; she didn't want me to come alone."

Ashley nodded. "so why Eastern?"

"whats with the third degree?" I said. The questions were drifting from small talk to personal and I was beginning to get uncomfortable.

Several chairs knocked together as the soccer team left their seats. They traded on last joke before they meandered towards the door. Their pace quickened when Ashley stood up. Those in the back of the group pushed those in the front to escape before Ashley made her way across the room. She sat down, forcing the frustration and anger away.

I raised an eyebrow. "you were going to say why you chose Eastern" she prompted

"its hard to explain" I said shrugging "I guess it just felt right

She smiled as she opened her menu. "I know what you mean."


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own neither SON or Beautiful Disaster the book**

Familiar faces filled the seats of our favorite lunch table. Kyla sat in one side of me, Carmen on the other, and the rest of the spaces were picked by Aiden and his Sigma Tau brothers. It was hard to hear with the low roar inside the cafeteria, and the air conditioner seemed to be on the fritz again. the air was thick with the smells of fried food and sweaty skin, but somehow everyone seemed to be more energetic than usual.

"hey, Brazil" Aiden said, greeting the man sitting in front of me. his olive skin and chocolate eyes offset the white Eastern Football hat pulled low on his forehead.

"missed you after the game Saturday, Aid. I drank a beer or a six for ya" he said with a broad white grin.

"I appreciate it, I took Ky out to dinner," he said, leaning over to kiss the top of Kylas long brown hair.

"you're sitting in my chair brazil"

Brazil turned to see Ashley standing behind him, and then looked at me, surprised. "oh, is she one of your girls, Ash?"

"Absolutely not," I said, shaking my head.

Brazil looked to Ashley, who stared at him expectantly, Brazil shrugged and the took his tray to the end of the table. Ashley smiled at me as she settled into the seat. "What's up Pidge?"

"What is that?" I asked, unable to look away from her tray. The mystery food on her plate looked like a wax display. Ashley laughed and took a drink from her water glass. "the cafeteria ladies scare me im not about to critique their cooking skills,"

I didn't miss the appraising eyes of those sitting at the table. Ashley's behavior piqued their curiosity, and I subdued a smile at being the only girl they had seen her insist on sitting with.

"ugh…the Bio test is after lunch," Kyla groaned

"did you study?" I asked

"God, no. I spent the night reassuring my boyfriend that you weren't going to sleep with Ashley"

The football players seated at the end of our table stopped their obnoxious laughter to listen more closely, making the other students take notice. I glared at Ky, but she was unconcerned with any blame, nudging Aiden with her shoulder.

"Jesus, Aid. You've got it that bad huh?" Ashley asked throwing a packet of ketchup at her cousin. Aiden didn't answer, but smiled appreciatively at Ashley for the diversion.

Kyla rubbed his back. "he's going to be okay. It's just going to take him a while to believe that Spence is resistant to your charms."

"I haven't tried to charm her" Ashley sniffed, seeming offended. "she's my friend" 29

I looked to Aiden. "I told you. You have nothing to worry about"

Aiden finally met my eyes, and upon seeing my sincere expression, his eyes brighten a bit.

"did you study?" Ashley asked me

I frowned " no amount of studying is going to help me with Biology, It's just something I can't wrap my head around."

Ashley stood up "C'mon"

"What?"

"Let's go get your notes. I'm going to help you study."

"Ashley…."

"get your ass up pidge. You're going to ace that test"

I tugged on one of Kylas long brown braids as I passed

"see you in class, ky"

She smiled, "I'll save you a seat. I'll need all the help I can get."

Ashley followed me to my room and I pulled out my study guide whiles he popped open my book. She quizzed me relentlessly, and then clarified a few things I didn't understand. In the way that she explained it. The concepts went from being confusing to obvious.

"….and somatic cells use mitosis to reproduce, that's when you have the phases. They sound sort of like a woman's name: Prometa Anatela"

I laughed. "Prometa Anatela?"

"prophase, metaphase, anaphase and telophase…."

"Prometa Anatela" I repeated, nodding.

She smacked the top of my head with the papers. " you got this, you know this study guide backwards and forward"

I sighed "well…..we'll see"

"im going to walk you to class, I'll quiz you on the way"

I locked the door behind us. "you're not going to be mad if I flunk this test, are you?"

"you're not going to flunk, Pidge. We need to start earlier for the next one, though," she said, keeping in step with me to the science building.

"how are you going to tutor me, do your homework, study and train for your fights?"

Ashley chuckled. "I don't train for my fights, Adam calls me, tells me where the fight is, and I go."

I shook my head in disbelief as she held the paper in front of her to ask the first question. We had nearly finished a second round of the study questions when we reached my class.

"kick ass," she smiled, handing me the notes and leaning against the doorjamb.

"hey, Ash."

I turned to see a tall, somewhat lanky woman smile at Ashley on her way into the classroom

"Kelly" Ashley nodded

Kelly's eyes brighten a bit when she looked to me, and she smiled "hi Spence,"

"hi" I said, surprised the she knew my name. I had seen her in class, but we'd never met.

Kelly continued to her seat, joking with those sitting beside her "who's that?" I asked

Ashley shrugged, but the skin around her eyes seemed tenser than before. "Kelly Hayes. She's one of Sig Tau guys sister"

"you hang out with people from a frat?" I asked, doubtful.

"Aiden is and I'm always hanging with them, I taught you knew that" she said looking beyond me to Kelly

"well you don't seem the… like you would hang out with a fraternity" I said eyeing the tattoos on her forearm.

Ashley turned his attention to me and grinned. "my dad is alumnus, and my brothers are all Sig Tau" she said filching to my papers "better get to class"

"thanks for helping me" I said, nudging her with my elbow, Kyla passed and I followed her to our seats.

"How did it go? She asked

I shrugged "she 's good tutor"

"just a tutor?"

"she 's a good friend too"

She seemed disappointed, and I giggled as the fallen expression on her face.

It had always been a dream of Kyla's for us to date friends, and roommates-slash cousins, for her , was hitting the jackpot. She wanted us to room together when she decided to come with me to Eastern, but I vetoed her idea, hoping to spread my wings a bit. Once she finished pouting, she forced on finding a friend of Aiden's to introduced me to.

Ashley's healthy interest in me had me surpassed her ideas. I breezed through the test and sat on the steps outside the building, waiting for kyla. When she slumped down beside me in defeat. I waited for her to speak.

"that was awful!" she cried

"you should study with us. Ashley explains it really well." Kyla groaned and leaned her head on my shoulder "you were no help at all! Couldn't you have given me a courtesy nod or something?" I hooked my arm around her neck and walked her to our dorm.

…..

Over the next week, Ashley helped with my history paper and tutored me in Biology. We stood together scanning the grade board outside Professor Campbell's office. My student number was three spots from the top.

"Third-highest test grade in the class! Nice, Pidge!" she said, squeezing me. her eyes were bright with excitement and pride, and an awkward feeling made me take a step back.

"thanks, Ash. Couldn't have done it without you: I said, pulling on her shirt.

She tossed me over her shoulder, making her way through the crowd behind us "make way! Move it, people! Lets make room for this poor womans hideously disfigured, ginormous brain! Shed a fucking genius!"

I giggles at the amused and curious expressions of my classmates.

As the day went by, we fielded the persistent rumors about a relationship. Ashleys reputation helped to quiet the gossip. She had never been known to stay with any girl longer than a night, so the more times we were seen together, the more people understood our platonic relationship for what it was. Even with the constant questions about our involvement, the stream of attention Ashley received from her coeds didn't recede.

She continues to sit next to me in history and eat with me at lunch. It didn't take long to realize I had been wrong about her, even finding myself defensive toward those who didn't know Ashley the way I did.

In the cafeteria, Ashley set a can of orange juice in front of me. "you didn't have to do that. I was going to grab one," I said, peeling off my jacket.

"well, now you don't have to," she said, with a nose crinkled smiled

Brazil snorted "did she turn you into a maid, Ashley? Whats next, fanning her with a palm tree leaf?"

Ashley shot him a murderous glare, and I jumped to her defense "Just….dont talk about her like that" I said frowning. Ashleys expression was a mixture of surprised and gratitude. "Now I've seen it all. I was just defended by a girl" she said, standing up. Before she left with her tray, she offered one more warning glare to Brazil, and then walked outside to stand with a small group of fellow smokers outside the building.

I tried not to watch her while she laughed and talked. Every girl in the group subtly competes for the space next to her, and Kyla shoved her elbow into my ribs when she notices my attention elsewhere.

"Whatcha lookin' at, Spence?"

"nothing. I'm not looking at anything."

She rested her chin on her hand and shook her head .

"they're so obvious. Look at the redhead. Shes run her fingers through her hair as many times as shes blinked. I wonder if Ashley gets tired of that"

Aiden nodded. "he does. Everyone thinks she's this asshole, but if they knew how much patience she has dealing with every girl that thinks she can tame her….. She cant go anywhere without them bugging him. Trust me; she's more polite than I would be."

"oh, like you wouldn't love it" Kyla said, kissing his cheek

Ashley was finishing her cigarette outside the cafeteria when I passed. "Wait up, Pidge. I'll walk you."

"you don't have to walk me to every class, Ashley. I know how to get there on my own."

Ashley was easily sidetracked by a girl with long black hair and a short skirt. She walked by, smiling at her. she followed her with her eyes and nodded in the girls direction, throwing down her cigarette.

"I'll catch up with you later, Pidge."

"Yeah," I said, rolling my eyes as she jogged to the girl's side. Ashleys seat remained empty during class and I found myself a bit irritated with her for missing over a girl she didn't know. Professor Chaney dismissed early and I hurried across the lawn, aware that I was to meet Carmen at three to give her Sherri Cassidy's Music Appreciation notes. I looked at my watch and quickened my pace.

"Spencer?"

Parker jogged across the grass to walk beside me. "I don't think we've officially met," he said, holding his hand. "parker Hayes."

I took his hand and smiled "Spencer Carlin"

"I was behind you when you got your Bio test grade. Congratulations," he smiled, shoving his hand in his pockets.

"Thanks. Ashley helped, or I would've been at the bottom of that list, trust me."

"oh, are you two…..?"

"Friends"

Parker nodded and smiled. "did she tell you there's a party at the House this weekend?"

"we mostly just talk about biology and food"

Parker laughed. "that sounds like Ashley"

At the door of Morgan hall, Parker scanned my face with his big green eyes "you should come. It'll be fun."

"I'll talk to Kyla. I don't think we have any plans."

"are you a package deal?"

"we made a pact this summer. No parties solo"

"smart." He nodded in approval

"she met Aid at orientation, so I haven't really had to tag along with her much. This will be the first time I've needed to ask her, so I'm sure she'll be happy to come." I inwardly cringed. Not only was I babbling it was obvious that I didnt get asked to parties.

"great. I'll see you there" hes said. He flashed his perfect Banana Republic-model smile with his square jaw and naturally tan skin, turning to walk across campus.

I watched him walk away; he was tall clean-shaven, with a pressed pin-stripped dress shirt and jeans. His wavy dark-blond hair bounced when he walked.

I bit my lip, flattered by his invitation.

"now he's more your speed," Carmen said in my ear

"he's cute, huh?" I asked, unable to stop smiling.

"Yea, in that preppy, missionary-position kind of way"

"Carmen!" I cried smacking her on the shoulder

"did you get Sherrie's notes?"

"I did" I said, pulling them from my bag. She lit a cigarette, held it between her lips, and squinted at the papers.

"Fucking brilliant" she said scanning the pages. She folded them away in her pocket and then took another drag "Good thing Morgans boilers are out. You'll need a cold shower after getting ogled by that tall drink of water"

"the dorm doesn't have water?" I wailed

"that's the word," Carmen said sliding her backpack over her shoulder "im off to algebra. Tell Ky I said not to forget me this weekend."

"I'll tell her," I grumbled , glaring up at the antique brick walls of our dormitory. I stomped up to my room, pushed through the door and let my backpack fall to the floor.

"no hot water" kara mumbled from her side of the desk

"I heard"

My cell phone buzzed and I clicked it open, reading a text message from Kyla cursing the boilers. A few moments later there was a knock on the door.

Kyla walked and plopped onto my bed, arms crossed.

"can you believe this shit? How much are we paying and we cant even take a hot shower?"

Kara sighed, "stop whining, why don't you just stay with your boyfriend? Haven't been staying with him anyway?"

Kylas eyes darted to Karas direction. "good idea, Kara. The fact that you're a total bitch comes in handy sometimes"

Kara kept her eyes on her computer monitor, unfazed by Kylas jab.

Kyla pulled out her cell and clicked out a text message with amazing precision and speed. Her phone chirped and she smiled at me "we're staying with Aiden and Ashley until they fix the boilers"

"What? I'm not!" I cried

"oh, yes you are. There's no reason for you to be stuck here freezing in the shower when Ashley and Aiden have two bathrooms at their place."

"I wasn't invited."

"I'm inviting you, Aiden already said it was fine, you can sleep on the couch…. If Ashley isn't using it"

"and if shes using it?"

Kyla shrugged. "then you can sleep in ashleys bed"

"no way!"

She rolled her eyes "don't be such a baby, Abby. You guys are friends, right? If she hasn't tried anything by now, I don't think she will"

Her words made my mouth open snap shut. Ashley had been around me in one way or another every night for weeks, I had been so occupied with making sure everyone's knew we were just friends, it hadn't occurred to me that she really was interested only in friendship. I wasn't sure why, but I felt insulted.

Kara looked at us in disbelief "Ashley hasn't tried to sleep with you?"

"we're friends!" I said in a defensive tone

"I know but he hasn't even tried? She has slept with everyone"

"except us" kyla said looking her over "and you"

Kara shrugged "well I've never met her. I've just heard"

"exactly" I snapped "you don't even know her"

Kara returned to her monitor, oblivious to our presence.

I sighed "all right, Ky. I need to pack"

"make sure you pack for a few days; who knows how long it will take them to fix the boilers?" she said, entirely too excited.

Dread settled over me as if I were about to sneak into enemy territory "ugh….all right" Kyla bounced when she hugged me "this is going to be so fun!"

Half an hour later we loaded down her Honda and headed for the apartment. Kyla hardly took a breath between rambling as she drove. She honked her horn as she slowed to a stop in her usual parking space. Aiden jogged down the steps and pulled both of our suitcases from the trunk, following us up the stairs.

"its open," he puffed

Kyla pushed the door and held it open. Aiden grunted when he dropped our luggage to the floor "Christ, baby! Your suitcase is twenty more pounds than Spencers!"

Kyla and I froze when a woman emerged from the bathroom, buttoning her blouse

"hi" she said, surprised. Her mascara-smeared eyes examined us before setting on our luggage. I recognized her as the leggy brunette Ashley had followed from the cafeteria.

Kyla glared at Aiden

He held up his hands "she's with Ashley"

Ashley rounded the corner in a pair of boy shorts and sports bra and yawned. She looked at her guest and the patted her backside.

"my company's here you better go"

She smiled and wrapped her arms around her, kissing her neck "I'll leave my number on the counter"

"eh…. Don't worry about it" Ashley said in a casual tone

"what?" she asked, leaning back to look in her eyes

"every time!" kyla said. She looked at the woman "how are you surprised by this? She's Ashley fucking Davies! She is famous for this very thing and every time they're surprised!" she said, turning to Aiden. He put his arm around her, gesturing for her to calm down.

The girl narrowed her eyes at Ashley and then grabbed her purse and stormed out, slamming the door behind her/

Ashley walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge as if nothing happened.

Kyla shooked her head and walked down the hall. Aiden followed her, angling his body to compensate for the weight of her suitcase as he trailed behind.

I collapsed against the recliner and sighed, wondering if I was crazy for agreeing to come. I didn't realized Aidens apartment was a revolving door for clueless bimbos.

Ashley stood behind the breakfast bar, crossed her arms over her chest and smiled "whats wrong, pidge? Hard day?"

"no, I'm thoroughly disgusted"

"with me?" she was smiling. I should have known that she expected the conversation. It only made me less inclined to hold back

"yes, you. How can you just use someone like that and treat them that way?"

"how did I treat her? she offered her number, I declined." My mouth fell open at his lack of remorse. "you'll have sex with her, but you wont take her number?"

Ashley leaned on the counter with her elbows "why would I want her number if I'm not going to call her?"

"why would you sleep with her if you're not going to call her?"

"I don't promise anyone anything, pidge. She didn't stipulate a relationship before she spread-eagled on my couch"

I stared at the couch with revulsion "she's someone's daughter, Ashley. What if, down the line, someone treats your daughter like that's?"

"my daughter better not drop her panties for some jackass she just met , lets put it that way."

I crossed my arms, angry that she made sense "so, besides admitting that you're a jackass, you're saying that because she slept with you, she deserved to be tossed out like a stray cat?"

"I'm saying that I was honest with her. she's an adult, it was consensual…she was a little to eager about it, if you want to know the truth. You act like I committed a crime"

"she didn't seem as clear about your intention, Ashley"

"women usually justify their actions with whatever they make up in their heads. She didn't tell me up front that she expected a relationship any more than I told her I expected sex with no strings. How is it different?"

"you're a pig"

Ashley shrugged "I've been called worse"

I stared at the couch, the cushions still askew and bunched up from its recent use. I recoiled at the thought of how many women had given themselves away against the fabric. Itchy fabric at that.

"I guess I'm sleeping on the recliner" I grumbled

"why?"

I glared at her, furious over her confused expression "I'm not sleeping on that thing! god knows what I'd be lying in!" she lifted my luggage off the floor "you're not sleeping on the couch or the recliner. You're sleeping in my bed."

"which is more unsanitary than the couch, I'm sure"

"theres never been anyone in my bed but me" I rolled my eyes

"give me a break!"

"I'm absolutely serious. I fuck em on the couch. I don't let them in my room"

"then why am I allowed in your bed?"

One corner of her mouth pulled up into an impish grin "are you planning on having sex with me tonight?"

"no!"

"that's why. Now get your cranky ass up, take your hot shower and then we can study some Bio."

I glared at her for a moment and then grudgingly did as she commanded. I stood under the shower entirely too long, letting the water wash away my aggravation. Massaging the shampoo through my hair, I sighed at how wonderful it was to shower in a non-communal bathroom again-no flip-flops, no toiletry bag, just the relaxing blend of water and stream.

The door opened and I jumped "ky?"

"no, its me" Ashley said

I automatically wrapped my arms over the parts I didn't want her to see, "what are you doing in here? Get out!"

"you forgot a towel and I brought your clothes and your toothbrush, and some weird face cream I found in your bag"

"you went through my stuff?" I shrieked, she didn't answer. Instead I heard the faucet turn on and the sound of her toothbrush brushing against her teeth.

I peeked out of the plastic curtain, holding it against my chest "get out Ashley"

She looked up at her lips covered in suds from her toothpaste. "I cant go to bed without brushing my teeth"

"if you come within two feet of this curtain, I will poke out your eyes while you sleep."

"I wont peek, Pidge" she chuckled

I waited under the water with my arms wrapped tightly across my chest. She spit , gurgled and spit again, and then the door closed. I rinsed the soap foam from my skin, dried as quickly as possible and then pulled my t-shirt and shorts on, slipping on my glasses and raking a comb through my hair. The night moisturizer Ashley brought caught my eye and I couldn't help but smile. She was thoughtful and almost nice when she wanted to be.

Ashley opened the door again "c'mon pidge! I'm getting old here"

I threw my comb at her and she ducked, shutting the door and laughing to herself all the way to her room. I brushed my teeth and then shuffles down the hall, passing Aidens room on the way.

"nigh Spence" kyla called from the darkness

"night kyla"

I hesitated before leading two soft knocks on Ashleys door. "come in, Pidge. You don't have to knock"

He pulled the door to the line and I walked in seeing her black iron rod bed parallel to the line of the window on the far side of the room. The walls were bare except for a lone sombrero above her headboard. I half expected her room to be covered in posters of barley clothes women, but I didn't even see an advertisement for a beer brand. Her bed was black, carpet grey; everything else in the room was white. It looked as if she had just moved I n.

"nice pJ's" Ashley said noting my yellow and navy plaid shorts and grey Eastern T. she sat on her bed and patted the pillow besides her "well. Come on. Im not going to bite you"

"im not afraid of you" I said walking over to the bed and dropping my biology book beside him "do you have a pen?"

He nodded to her nigh table "top drawer"

I reached across the bed and pulled open the drawer, finding three pens, and several types of tube of lube. I grabbed a pen and shoved the drawer shut

"what?" she asked, turning a page of my book.

"did you rob a sex shop?"

"no, why?"

I pulled the cap from the pen, unable to keep the sickened expression from my face "your lifetime supply of lube"

"better prepared than sorry, right?"

I rolled my eyes, Ashley returned to the pages, a wry smile breaking across her lips. She read the notes to me, highlighting the main points while she asked me questions and patiently explained what I didn't comprehend.

After an hour, I pulled off my glasses and rubbed my eyes. "I'm beat. I cant memorize one more macromolecule"

Ashley smiled, closing my book "all right"

I paused, unsure of our sleeping arrangement. Ashley left the room and walked down the hall, mumbling something into Aidens room before turning on the shower. I turned back the covers and then pulled them up to my neck, listening to the high-pitched whine of the water shut off and then the floor creaked under Ashleys steps. She strolled across the room with just a towel appeared around her. I intentionally kept my back to her while she stood in front of her dresser and dropped her towel to slip on a pair of boxers and a wife beater.

After flipping off the light, she crawled into the bed beside me. "you're sleeping here too?" I asked, turning to look at her. The full moon outside the windows cast shadows across her face

"well, yeah. This is my bed"

"I know but i…" I paused. My only other options were the couch or the recliner

Ashley grinned and shook her head "don't you trust me by now? I'll be on my best behavior, I swear" she said holding up fingers that I was sure the Boy Scouts of America had never considered using.

I didn't argue, I simply turned away and rested my head on the pillow, tucking the covers behind me to create a clear barrier between her body and mine.

"goodnight Spence" she whispered into my ear. I could feel her minty breath on my flesh. Giving me goose bumps on every inch of my flesh. Thank god it was dark enough that she couldn't see my embarrassing reaction of the flush of m y cheeks that followed.

….

It seemed liked I had just closed my eyes when I heard the alarm. I reached to turn it off but wrenched back my and in horror when I felt warm skin beneath my fingers. I tried to recall where I was. When the answer hit, it mortified me that Ashley might think I'd done it on purpose.

"Ash, your alarm" I whispered, she still didn't move. "Ashley!" I said nudging her. when she still didn't stir. I reached across her, fumbling in the dim light until I felt the top of the clock. Unsure of how to turn it off, I smacked the top of it until I hit the snooze button, and then fell against my pillow with a huff.

Ashley chuckled

"you were awake?"

"I promised I'd behave. I dint say anything about letting you lay on me"

"I didn't lie on you: I protested " I couldn't reach the clock. That has to be the most annoying alarm I've ever heard. It sounds like a dying animal"

She reached over and flipped a button "you want breakfast?"

I glared at her, and then shook my head. "im not hungry"

"well, I am. Why don't you ride with me down the street to the café?"

"I don't think I can handle your lack of driving skills this early in the morning" I said, I swung my feet over the side of the bed and shoved them into my slippers, shuffling to the door

"where are you going?" she asked

"to get dressed and go to class. Do you need an itinerary while im here"

Ashley stretched and then walked over to me, "are you always so temperamental, or will that taper off once you believe I'm not creating some elaborate scheme to get into your pants?" her hands cupped my shoulders, and I felt her thumbs cares my skin in unison.

"im not temperamental"

She leaned in close and whispered In my ear "I don't want to sleep with you, I like you too much."she walked past me to the bathroom and I stood stunned. Kaaras words replayed in my mind. Ashley Davies slept with everyone; I couldn't help but feel deficient in some way, knowing she had no desire to even try to sleep with me.

The door opened again and Kyla walked through "Wakey, wakey, eggs 'n' bakey!" she smiled yawning

"you're turning into mother Ky" I grumbled, rifling through my suitcase.

"Oooh… did someone miss some sleep last night?"

"she barley breathed in my direction" I said acerbically

A knowing smile brightened Kylas face "oh"

"oh, what?"

"nothing" she said returning to Aidens room

Ashley was in the kitchen, humming a random tune while scrambling eggs "you're sure you don't want some?" she asked

"I'm sure, thanks though"

Aiden and Kyla walked in and Aiden pulled two plats from the cabinet, holding them out as Ashley shoveled a pile of steaming eggs onto each one. Aiden set the plates on the bar and he and kyla sat together, satisfying the appetite they more than likely worked up last night.

"don't look at me like that, Aid, I just don't want to go" kyla said

"baby, the house has a date party twice a year" Aiden spoke as he chewed "it's a month away, you'll have plenty of time to find a dress and do all that girl stuff"

"I would, aid….. that's really sweet.. but im not going to know anyone there"

"A lot of the girls that come don't know a lot of people there" he said surprised at the rejection.

She slumped In her chair. "the sorority bitches get invited to these things. They'll all know each other… it'll be weird"

"c'mon, Ky. Don't make me go alone"

"well…. Maybe you could find someone to take Spencer?" she said looking at me then at Ashley

Ashley raised and eyebrow, and Aiden shook his head "Ash doesn't go got the dater parties. Its something you take your girlfriend to…and Ashley doesn't… you know"

Kyla shrugged. "we could set her up with someone"

I narrowed my eyes at her "I can hear you, you know" kyla used the face she knew I couldn't say no to "please Spence? We'll find you someone nice that's funny and witty and you know I'll make sure they are hot. I promise you'll have a good time! And who knows? Maybe you'll hit it off"

Ashley threw the pan in the sink "I didn't say I wouldn't take her" I rolled my eyes "don't do me favor, Ashley"

"that's not what I meant, Pidge. Date parties are for people with girlfriends and its common knowledge that I dont do the girlfriend thing. but I wont have to worry about you expecting an engagement ring afterward"

Kyla jutted her lip out "pretty please, Spence?"

"don't look at me like that!" I complained "ashley doesn't want to go, I don't want to go… we wont be much fun"

Ashley crossed her arms and leaned against the sink "I didn't say I didn't want to go. I think it'd be fun if the four of us went" she shrugged.

Everyone's eyes focused on me, and I recoiled "why don't we hang out here?" Kyla pouted and Aiden leaned forward "because I have to go Spencer, im a freshman. I have to make sure everything's moving smoothly, everyone has a beer in their hand, things like that.

Ashley walked across the kitchen and wrapped her arm around my shoulder, pulling me to her side "c'mon Pidge, will you go with me?"

I looked at Kyla, then at Aiden and finally at Ashley "Yes" I sighed

Kyla squealed and hugged me, and then I felt Aidens hand on my back "Thanks Spencer" Aiden said.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own neither SON or Beautiful Disaster the book**

**Chp.3 Cheap Shot **

Carmen took another drag, the smoke flowed from her nose in two thick streams. I angled my face toward the sun as she regaled me with the recent weekend of dancing, booze and a very persistent new friend.

"if she's stalking you then why do you let him buy you drinks?" I laughed

"its simple, Spencer. I'm broke"

I laughed again, and Carmen jabbed her elbow into my side when she caught sight of Ashley walking towards us.

"hey Ashley" Carmen lilted, winking at me

"Carmen" Ashley said with a nod. She dangles her keys. "I'm headed home, pidge. You need a ride?"

"I was just going in" I said, grinning up at her through my sunglasses

"you're not staying with me tonight?" she asked, her face was a combination of surprise and disappointed

"no, I am. I just had to grab a few things that I forgot."

"like what?"

"well, my razor for one. What do you care?"

"it's about time you shaved your legs. They've been tearing the hell outta mine" she said with an impish grin

Carmen's eyes bulged as she gave me a quick one-over and I made a face at Ashley. "that's how rumors get started" I look at Carmen and shook my head "I'm sleeping in her bed…..just sleeping"

"right" Carmen said with a smug smile

I smacked Carmen's arm before yanking the door open and climbing the stairs. By the time I reached the second floor, Ashley was beside me

"oh don't be mad. I was just kidding"

"everyone already assumes we're having sex. You're making it worse"

"who cares what they think?"

"I do, Ashley! I do!" I pushed open my doors, shoved random items into a small tote and then stormed out, with Ashley trailing behind. She chuckles as she took the bag from my hand and I glared at her. "it's not funny. Do you want the whole school to think I'm one of your sluts?"

Ashley frowned "no one thinks that and if they do they better hope I don't hear about it"

She held the door open and after walking through, I stopped abruptly in front of her.

"whoa!" she said, slamming into me

I flipped around "oh my God! People probably think we're together and you're shamelessly continuing your…lifestyle. I must look pathetic" I said, coming to the realization as I spoke "I don't think I should stay with you anymore. We should just stay away from each other in general for a while"

I took my bag from her and she snatched it back. "no one thinks we're together, Spence. You don't have to quit talking to me to prove a point"

We engaged in a tug-of-war with the tote and when she fused to let go, I growled loudly in frustration "have you ever had a girl- that's friend- stay with you? Have you ever given girls rides to and from school? Have you eaten lunch with them every day? No one knows what to think about us, even when we tell them!"

She walked to the parking lot holding my effects hostage. "I'll fix this okay? I don't want anyone thinking less of you because of me" she said with a troubled expression. Her eyes brightened and she smiled "let me make it up to you, why don't we go to the Dutch tonight?"

"that's a biker bar,: I sneered, watching her fasten my tote to her bike

"okay, then let's go to the club. I'll take you to dinner and then we can go to the Red Door. My treat."

"how will going out to dinner and then to a club fix the problem? When people see us out together it will make it worse"

She straddles her bike "think about it. Me, drunk, in a room full of scantily clad women? It won't take long for people to figure out we're not together."

"so what am I suppose to do? take someone home from the bar to drive the point home?"

"I didn't say that, no need to get carried away" she said with a frown. I rolled my eyes and climbed onto the seat, wrapping my arms around her middle. "some random girl is going to follow us home from the bar? That's how you're going to make it up to me?"

"you're not jealous, are you?"

"jealous of what? The Std-infested imbecile you're going to piss off in the morning?"

Ashley laughed and then started her Harley. She flew towards her apartment at twice the speed limit and I closed my eyes to block out the trees and cars we left behind.

After climbing off her bike, I smacked her shoulder "did you forget I was with you? Are you trying to get me killed?"

"its hard to forget you're behind me when your thighs are squeezing the life out of me" a smirk came with her next thought " I couldn't think of a better way to dies, actually"

"there is something very wrong with you"

We had barely made it inside when Kyla shuffles out of Aiden's room "we were thinking about going out tonight, you guys in?"

I looked at Ashley and grinned "we're going to swing by the sushi place before we go to red"

Kyla smiled spanned from one side of her face to the other "Aiden!" she cried, scampering into the bathroom "we're going out tonight!"

I was the last one in the shower, so Aiden, Kyla and Ashley were impatiently standing by the door when I stepped out of the bathroom in a black dress and hot pink heels.

Kyla whistled "hot damn, Mama!"

I smiled in appreciation and Ashley held out her hand "nice legs"

"did I mention that it's a magic razor?"

"I don't think it's the razor" she smiled, pulling me out the door

We were far too loud and obnoxious in the sushi bar and had already had a nights worth to drink before we stepped foot in the Red Door. Aiden pulled into the parking lot, taking time to find a space.

"Sometime tonight, Aid" Kyla muttered

"hey I have to find a wide space, I don't want some drunken idiot dinging the paint"

Once we parked, Ashley leaned the seat forwards and helped me out "I meant to ask you about your ID's they're flawless. You didn't get them around here."

"yea, we've had them for a while. It was necessary….in Wichita." I said

"necessary?" Ashley asked

"it's a good thing you have connections" Kyla said, she hiccupped and covered her mouth, giggling

"dear god, woman" Aiden said, holding Kyla's arm as she awkwardly stepped along the gravel. "I think you're already done for the night"

Ashley made a face "what are you talking about, Ky? What connections?"

"Spencer has some old friends that-"

"they're fake ID's Ash," I interrupted. "you have to know the right people if you want them done right, right?"

Kyla purposefully looked away from Ashley, and I waited.

"right" she said extending her hand for mine.

I grabbed three of her fingers and smiled, knowing by her expression that she wasn't satisfied with my answer.

"I need another drink!" I said as a second attempt to change the subject

"shots" Kyla yelled

Aiden rolled his eyes "oh yea. That's what you need another shot"

Once inside, Kyla immediately pulled me on to the dance floor. Her brown hair was everywhere, and I laughed at the duck face she made when she moved to the music. When the song was over, we joined the boys at the bar. An excessively voluptuous platinum blonde was already at Ashley's side. And Kyla's face screwed into revulsion.

"its going to be like this all night, ky. Just ignore them" Aiden said. Nodding to a small group of girls standing a few feet away. They eyed the blonde waiting for their turn.

"it looks like Vegas threw up on a flock of vultures" Kyla sneered

Ashley lit a cigarette as she ordered two more beers and the blonde bit her puffy, glossed lips and smiles. The bartender popped the tops open and slid the bottles to Ashley. The blonde picked up one of the beer but Ashley pulled it from her hand

"uh….not yours" she said to her, handing it to me. my initial though was to toss the bottle in the trash but the woman looked so offended I smiled and took a drink. She walked off in a huff and I chuckled that Ashley didn't seem to notice.

"like I would buy a beer to some chick at a bar "she said shaking her head. I held up my beer and she pulled up one side of her mouth into a half smile "you're different"

I clinked my bottle against hers. "to being the only girl a girl with no standards doesn't want to sleep with" I said taking a swig.

"are you serious?" she asked, pulling the bottle from my mouth. When I dint recant, she leaned toward me "first of all… I have standards. I've never been with an ugly woman. Ever. Second of all, I wanted to sleep with you. I thought about throwing you over my couch fifty different ways, but I haven't because I don't see you that way anymore. Its not that I'm not attracted to you, I just think you are better than that"

I couldn't hold back the smug smile that crept across my face "you think I'm too good for you"

She sneered at my second insult "I can't think of a single person I know that's good enough for you"

The smugness melted away, replaced with a touched, appreciative smile "thanks, Ash" I said setting my empty bottle on the bar.

Ashley pulled on my hand "c'mon" she said tugging me through the crowd to the dance floor.

"I've had a lot to drink I'm going o fall"

Ashley smiled and pulled me to her. grabbing my hips "shut up and dance"

Kyla and Aiden appeared beside us. Aiden moved like he had been watching too many Usher videos. Ashley had me near panic with the way she was pressed against me. is she used any of these moves on the couch, I could see why so many girls chanced humiliation in the morning.

She cinched her hands around my hips and I noticed that her expression was different, almost serious. I ran my hands over her chest and then abs as they she tensed under her shirt to the music. I turned my back to her smiling when she wrapped her arms around my waist. Coupled with the alcohol in my system, when she pulled my body against hers, things came to mind that were anything but friendly.

The next song blend into the one we were dancing to and Ashley showed no signs of wanting to return to the bar. The sweat beaded on the back of my neck, and the multicolored stobe lights made me feel a bit dizzy. I closed my eyes and leaned against her shoulder. She grabbed my hands and pulled them around her neck. Her hands ran down my arms and down my ribs, finally returning to my hips. When I felt her lips and then tongue against my neck, I pulled away from her.

She chuckled, looking a bit surprised "what, Pidge?"

My temper flared, making the sharp words I wanted to say stick to my throat. I retreated to the bar and ordered another corona. Ashley took the stool beside me, holding up her finger to order one for herself. As soon as the bartender set the bottle in front of me, I tipped it up and drank half the contents before slamming it to the bar.

"you think this is going to change anyone's mind about us?" I said pulling my hair to the side, covering the spot she kissed.

She laughed once "I don't give a dam what they think about us"

I shot her a dirty look and then turned to face forward

"pidge" she said, touching my arm. I pulled away from her

"don't, I could never get drunk enough to let you get me to the couch"

Her face twisted in ager but before she could say anything a dark haired stunner with pouty lips, enormous blue eyes and far too much cleavage approached her.

"well if it isn't Ashley Davies" she said bouncing in all the right places.

She took a drink and then her eyes locked on mine "hey Megan"

"introduce me to your girlfriend" she said. I rolled my eyes

Ashley tipped her head back to finish her beer and then slid her empty bottle down the bar. Everyone waiting to order watched as it fell into the trash can at the end "she's not my girlfriend"

She grabbed Megan's hand, and she happily traipsed behind her to the dance floor. She all but mauled her for one song and then another and another. They were causing a scene with the way she let her grope her and when she bent her over I turned my back to them.

"you look pissed" a man said as he sat next to me "is that your girlfriend out there?"

"no she's just a friend" I grumbled

"well that's good. That could have been pretty awkward for you if she is" he faced the dance floor shaking his head at the spectacle.

"tell me about it" I said drinking the last of my beer, I barley tasted the last two I had put away and my teeth were numb.

"would you like another one?" he asked. I looked over at him and he smiled "I'm Ethan"

"Spencer" I said taking his outstretched hand. He held up two fingers to the bartender and I smiled "thanks"

"so you live here?" he asked

"in Morgan hall at eastern"

"I have an apartment in Hinley"'

"you go to state?" I asked "what is that….like an hour away? What are you doing over here?"

"I graduated last may. My little sister goes to Easter. I'm staying with her this week while I apply for jobs."

"uh-oh…living in the real world huh?"

Ethan laughed "and its everything they say it is"

I pulled the gloss out of my pocket and smeared it across my lips, using the mirror lining the wall behind the bar.

"that's a nice shade" he said, watching me press my lips together.

I smiled, feeling the anger at Ashley and the heaviness of the alcohol. "maybe you can try it out later"

Ethan's eyes brighten as I leaned in closer and I smiled when he touched my knee. He pulled back his hand when Ashley stepped between us.

"you ready Pidge?"

"I'm talking, Ashley." I said moving her back. Her shirt was damp from the circus on the dance floor and I made a show of wiping my hand on my skirt.

Ashley's made a face "do you even know this guy?"

"this is Ethan" I said sending my new friend the best flirty smile I could manage

He winked at me and then looked at Ashley, extending his hand "nice to meet you"

Ashley watched me expectantly until I finally gave in, waving my hand in her "Ethan this is Ashley" I muttered

"Ashley Davies" she said staring at Ethan's hand as if she wanted to rip it off

Ethan's eyes grew wide as he awkwardly pulled back his hand "Ashley Davies? Eastern's Ashley Davies?"

I rested my cheek on my fist, dreading the inevitable fuel story swapping that would soon ensue.

Ashley stretched her arm behind me to grip the bat "yeah what of it?"

"I saw you fight Shawna Smith last year. I thought I was about to witness someone's death!"

Ashley glowered down at him "you wanna see it again?"

Ethan laughed once his eyes darting back and forth between us. When he realized Ashley was serious he smiled at me apologetically and left.

"are you ready now" she snapped

"you are such a bitch, you know that?"

"I've been called worse" she said helping me off the stool.

We followed Kyla and Aiden to the car and when Ashley tired to grab my hand to lead me across the parking lot, I yanked it away. She wheeled around and I jerked to a stop leaning back when she came within a few inches of my face.

"I should just kiss you and get over with" she yelled "you're being ridiculous! I kissed your neck so what?"

I could smell beer and cigarettes on her breath and pushed her away. "I'm not your fuck buddy, Ashley"

She shook her head in disbelief "I never said you were! You're around me 24-7, you sleep in my bed, but half the time you act like you don't want to be seen with me!"

"I came here with you"

"I have never treated you with anything but respect, pidge"

I stood my ground "no you treat me like your property. You had no right to run Ethan off like that!"

"do you know who he is" she asked when I shook my head she leaned in closer "I do, he was arrested last year for sexual battery but the charges were dropped"

I crossed my arms "oh, so you have something in common?"

Ashley's eyes narrowed and the her jaw tighten "are you calling me a rapist?" she said in a cold tone

I pressed my lips together, even angrier that she was right. I had taken it too far "no, I'm just pissed at you!"

"I've been drinking, all right? Your skin was there inches from my face and you're beautiful and you smell fucking awesome when you sweat. I kissed you! I'm sorry! Get over yourself!"

Her excuse made the corners of my mouth turn up "you think I'm beautiful? "

She frowned with disgust "you're gorgeous and you know it. What are you smiling about?"

I tried to quell my amusement, to no avail "nothing, let's go"

Ashley laughed once and shook her head "wha….?you…? you're a pain in my ass!" she yelled, glaring at me. I couldn't stop smiling and after a few seconds Ashley's mouth turned up. She shook her head again and then hooked her arm around my neck, "you're making me crazy, you know that right?"

At the apartment we all stumbled through the door. I made a beeline for the bathroom to wash the smoke out of my hair. When I stepped out of the shower, I saw that Ashley had brought me one of her big T-shirts and a pair of her boxers to change into.

The shirt swallowed me and the boxers disappeared under the shirt. I crashed into the bed and sighed, still smiling at what she'd said in the parking lot.

Ashley stared at me for a moment and I felt a twinge in my chest. I had an almost ravenous urge to grab her face and plant my mouth of hers but I fought against the alcohol and the hormones raging through my bloodstream.

"night Spence" she whispered, turning over.

I fidgeted, not yet ready to sleep "Ash?" I said leaning up to rest my chin on her shoulder

"yeah?"

"I know I'm drunk and we just got into a ginormous fight over this, but…."

"I'm not having sex with you, so quit asking" she said, her back still to me

"what? Not!" I cried

Ashley laughed and turned, looking at me with a soft expression "what, Spence?"

I sighed "this" I said laying my head on her chest and stretching my arm across her middle, snuggling as close to her as I could.

She stiffened and held her hands up, as if she didn't know how to react "you're drunk"

"I know" I said, too intoxicated to be embarrassed.

She relaxed one hand against my back and the other on my wet hair and then pressed her lips to my forehead "you are the most confusing woman I've ever met"

"it's the least you can do aster scaring off the only guy that approached me tonight"

"you mean Ethan the rapist? Yea, I owe you for that one"

"never mind" I said feeling the beginning of a rejection coming on.

She grabbed my arm and held it on her stomach to keep me from pulling away "no, I'm serious. You need to be more careful. If I wasn't there… I don't even want to think about it and now expect me to apologize for running him off?"

"I don't want you to apologize. Its not even about that"

"then what is it about?" she asked searching my eyes for something. Her face was just a few inches from mine and I could feel her breath on my lips.

I frowned "I'm drunk, Ashley. It's the only excuse I have"

"you just want me to hold you until you fall asleep?"

I didn't answer.

She just shifted to look straighter into my eyes "I should say no to prove a point" she said, her eyebrows pulling together "but I would hate myself later if I said no and you never asked me again"

I nestled my cheek against her chest and she tightened her arms sighing "you don't need an excuse Pidge, all you have to do is ask"

….

I cringed at the sunlight pouring through the window and the alarm blaring into my ear. Ashley was still asleep surrounding me with both her arms and legs. I maneuvered an arm free to reach over and pound the snooze button. Wiping my face, I looked at her, sleeping soundly two inches from me.

"oh my god" I whispered, wondering how we'd manage to become so tangled. I took a deep breath and held it as I worked to free myself from her.

"stop it Spencer, I'm sleepin" she mumbled, squeezing me against her

After several attempts I finally slid from her grip and sat on the edge of the bed, looking back at her half naked body draped in covers. I watched her for a moment and sighed. The lines were becoming blurred and it was my fault.

Her hand slid across the sheets and touched my fingers. "what's wrong?" she said, her eyes barley open

"I'm going to get a glass of water, you want anything? Ashley shook her head and closed her eyes , her cheek flat against in the mattress

"morning Spencer" Aiden said from the recliner when I rounded the corner

"Where's Kyla?"

"Still sleeping. What are you doing up so early?" he asked looking at the clock

"the alarm went off, but I always wake up early after I drink, it's a curse"

"me, too" he nodded

"you better get Ky up. We have class in an hour" I said running on the tap and leaning to take a sip

Aiden nodded "I was just going to let her sleep"

"don't do that, she'll be mad if she misses"

"oh" he said standing up "better wake her then" he wheeled around "hey Spencer?"

"yeah?"

"I don't know what's going on with you and Ashley, but I know that she's going to do something stupid to piss you off. It's a tic she has. She doesn't get close with anyone very often and for whatever reason she's let you in. but you have to overlook her demons. It's the only way she'll know"

"know what?"I asked raising an eyebrow at his melodramatic speech

"if you'll climb over the wall" he answered simply

I shook my head and chuckled "whatever you say Aid"

Aiden shrugged and then disappeared into his bedroom. I heard soft murmurs a protesting groan and them Kyla's sweet giggling.

I swirled the oatmeal around in my bowl and squeezed the chocolate syrup in as I stirred

"that's sick Spencer" Ashley said, she rubbed her eyes and pulled a box of cereal from the cabinet.

"good morning to you too" I said, snapping the cap on the bottle

"I hear your birthday is coming up. Last stand of your teenage years" she grinned, her eyes puffy and red

"yeah… I'm not a big birthday person. I think Kyla is going to take me to dinner or something" I smiled "you can come if you want"

"all right" she shrugged "it's a week from Sunday?"

"yes, when is yours?"

"not till April, April first"

"shut up"

"no, I'm serious" she said, chewing

"your birthday is on April fools?"

I asked again raising an eyebrow

She laughed "yes! You're gonna be late. I better get dressed."

"I'm riding with Kyla"

I could tell she was being intentionally cool when she shrugged "whatever" she said, turning her back to me to finish her cereal.


	4. Chapter 4

**So i started school again this past week so I'm going to try and post every week or every two weeks depending how bussy im with school. But besides that enjoy. **

**btw. I went over this chapter so hopefully there is no his/he/him or name confusions lol but if there is one or two error sorry its about 2am and sleep is catching up to me.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own neither SON or Beautiful DIsaster **

**chp.4 The Bet**

"He's definitely staring at you" Kyla whispered leaning to peek across the room

"Stop looking, dummy he's going to see you"

Kyla smiled and waved "he's already seen me. He's still staring"

I hesitated for a moment and then finally worked up enough courage to look In his direction. Parker was looking right at me, grinning

I returned his smiled and then pretended to type something on my laptop

"Is he still staring?" I murmured

"Yep" she giggled

After class parker stopped me in the hall

"Don't forget about the party this weekend"

"I won't" I said trying not to bat my eyes or do something else ridiculous

Kyla and I made our way across the lawn to the cafeteria to meet Ashley and Aiden for lunch. She was still laughing about Parker's behavior when they approached.

"Hey baby" Kyla said, kissing Aiden

"What's so funny?" he asked

"Oh, a guy in class was staring at Spencer all hour. It was adorable"

"As long as he was staring at Spencer" Aiden winked

"Who was it" Ashley grimaced

I adjusted my backpack, prompting Ashley to slide it off my arms and hold it. I shook my head "Kyla's imagining things"

"Spencer! You big fat liar! It was Parker Hayes and he was being so obvious. The guy was practically drooling"

Ashley's expression twisted into disgust "Parker Hayes?"

Aiden pulled on Kyla's hand "we are heading to lunch. Will you be joining me in the fine cafeteria cuisine this afternoon?"

Kyla kissed him again in answer and Ashley and I followed behind. I sat my tray between Kyla and Carmen but Ashley didn't sit in her normal seat across from me. Instead she sat a few seats down. It was then that I realized she hadn't said much during our walk to the cafeteria.

"Are you okay, Ash" I asked

"Me? Fine, why?" she said smoothing the features of her face

"You've just been quiet"

Several members of the football team approached the table and sat down, laughing loudly. Ashley looked a bit annoyed as she rolled her food around on her plate.

Chris Jenks tossed a French fry onto Ashley tray "what's up Ash? I heard you bagged Tina Martin. She's been raking your name through the mud today?"

"Shut up, Jenks" Ashley said, keeping her eyes on her food. I leaned forward so the brawny giant sitting in front of Ashley could experience the full force of my glare: "knock it off Chris"

Ashley's eyes bored into mine "I can take care of myself, Carlin"

"I'm sorry I…"

"I don't want you to be sorry, I don't want you to be anything" she said shoving away from the table and storming out the door

Carmen looked over at me with raised eyebrows "whoa. What'swas that about?"

I stabbed a tater tot with my fork and puffed "I don't know"

Aiden patted my back "it's nothing you did, Spence"

"She just has stuff going on" Kyla said

"What kind of stuff?" I asked

Aiden shrugged and turned his attention to his plate "you should know by now that it takes patience and forgiving attitude to be friends with Ashley. She's her own universe"

I shook my head "that's the Ashley everyone else sees….not the Ashley I know"

Aiden leaned forward "there's no difference, you just have to ride the wave"

After class I rode with Kyla to the apartment to find Ashley's motorcycle gone. I went into the room and curled into a ball on her bed, resting my head on my arm. Ashley had been fine that morning. As much time as we had spent together, I couldn't believe I didn't see that something had been bothering her. Not only that, it disturbed me that Kyla seemed to know what was going on and I didn't.

My breathing evened out and my eyes grew heavy, it wasn't long before I fell asleep. When my eyes opened again, the night sky had darkened the window. Muffled voices filtered down the hall from the living room, including Ashley's raspy voice. I crept down the hall and then froze when I heard my name

"Spencer gets it. Ash. Don't beat yourself up" Aiden said

"You're already going to the date party. What's the harm in asking her out?" Kyla said

I stiffened waiting for her response "I don't want to date her; I just want to be around her. She's….different"

"Different how?" Kyla asked, sounding irritated

"She doesn't put up with my bullshit, it's refreshing. You said it yourself, ky: im not her type. It's just not… like that with us"

"you're closer to her type than you know" Kyla said

I backed up as quietly as I could and when the wooden boards creaked beneath my feet. I reached over to pull Ashley's bedroom door shut and then walk down the hall

"hey, Spencer" Kyla said with a grin "how was your nap?"

"I was out for five hours. That's closer to a coma than a nap"

Ashley stared at me for a moment and when I smiled at her she walked straight to her bedroom. She shut the door and I felt my heart pounding in my chest, bracing for her to say something else to crush my ego.

Her eyebrows pulled in "I'm sorry. Pidge. I was a Bitch to you earlier"

I relaxed a bit, seeing the remorse in her eyes "I didn't know you were mad at me"

"I wasn't mad at you. I just have a bad habit of lashing out at those I care about. It's a piss-poor excuse. I know but I am sorry" she said, enveloping me in her arms.

I nestled my cheek against her neck settling in "what were you mad about?"

"it's not important. The only thing I'm worried about is you"

I leaned back to look at her "I can handle your temper tantrums"

Her eyes scanned my face for several moments before a small smiled spread across her lips "I don't know why you put up with me, and I don't know what I'd do if you didn't"

I could smell the mixture of cigarettes and mint on her breath and I looked at her lips, my body reacting to how close we 's expression changed and her breathing staggered she had noticed too.

She leaned in infinitesimally and then we both jumped when her cell rang. She sighed pulling it from her pocket.

"yeah. Hoffman? Jesus…. All right. That'll be an easy grand. Jefferson?" she looked at me and winked "we'll be there" she hung up and took my hand "come with me" she pulled me down the hall "that was Adam," she said to Aiden "Brandy Hoffman will be at Jefferson in ninety minutes"

Aiden nodded and stoop up, digging his cell phone from his pocket. He quickly tapped in the information, sending exclusive text invitations to those who knew about the Circle. Those ten or so members would text ten members on their list and so on, until every member knew exactly where the floating fight ring would be held.

"here we go" Kyla said smiling "we'd better freshen up!"

The air in the apartment was tense and the buoyant at the same time. Ashley seemed the least affected, slipping on her boots and a white tank top as if she were leaving to run an errand.

Kyla led me down the hall to Ashley's room and frowned "you have to change, Spencer. You can't wear that to the fight"

"I wore a freaking cardigan last time and you didn't say anything" I protested

"I didn't think you'll go last time. Here" she threw clothes at me "put this on"

"I am not wearing this"

"let's go!" Aiden called form the living room

"hurry up!" Kyla snapped, running into Aiden's room

I pulled on the deep-cut yellow halter top and low rise jeans Kyla had thrown at me, and then slipped on a pair of heels, raking a brush through my hair as I shuffled sown the hall. Kyla came out of her room with a short green baby doll dress and matching heels and when we rounded the corner Ashley and Aiden were standing at the door.

Ashley's mouth fell open "ooh hell no, are you trying to get me killed? You've gotta change Spence"

"what?" I asked

Kyla grabbed her hips "she looks cute, Ash, leave her alone!"

Ashley took my hand and led me down the hall "get a t-shirt on….and some sneakers. Something comfortable"

"what? Why?"

"because I'll be more worried about who's looking at your boobs in that shirt instead of Hoffman" she said stopping at the door.

"I thought you didn't give a dam what anyone else thought?"

"that's a different scenario, Pidge" Ashley looked down at my chest then up at me "you can't wear this to the fight, so please…just...please change" she stuttered, shoving me into the room shutting me in.

"Ashley!" I yelled. I kicked off my heels and shoved my feet into converse. Then wiggled out of my halter top, throwing it across the room. The first cotton shirt that I touched I yanked over my head and then ran down the hall standing in the doorway.

"better?" I huffed, pulling my hair into a ponytail

"yes!" Ashley said relieve "let's go!"

We raced to the parking lot. I jumped on the back of Ashley's motorcycle as she ripped the engine and peeled out, flying down the road to the college. I squeezed her middle in anticipation; the rushing to get out the door sent adrenaline surging through my veins.

Ashley drove over the curb, parking her motorcycle in the shadows behind the Jefferson Liberal Arts building. She pushed her sunglasses to the top of her head and then grabbed my hand, smiling as we snuck to the back of the building. She stopped at an open window near the ground.

My eyes winded with realization "you're joking"

Ashley smiled "this is the VIP entrance. You should see how everyone else gets in."

I shook my head as she worked her legs through and then disappeared. I leaned down and called into the oblivion "Ashley"

"Down here, Pidge. Just come feet first, I'll catch you"

"you're out of your mind if you think I'm jumping into the dark"

"I'll catch you I promise. Now get your ass in here"

I sighed, touching my forehead with my hand "this is insane"

I sat down and then scooted forward until half of my body was dangling in the dark. I turned onto my stomach and pointed my toes feeling the floor. I waited for my feet to touch Ashley'shand, but I lost my grip, squealing when I fell backward. A pair of hands grabbed me and I heard Ashley's voice in the darkness

"you fall like a girl" she chuckled

She lowered my feet to the grown and then pulled me deeper into the blackness. After a dozen steps I could hear the familiar yelling of numbers and names and then the room was illuminated. A lantern sat in the corner, lighting the room just enough that I could make out Ashley's face

"what are we doing?"

"waiting. Adam has to run through his spiel before I go in"

I fidgeted "should I wait here or should I go in? where do I go when the fight starts? Where's Aid and Ky?"

"they went in the other way. Just follow me out; I'm not sending you into that dark pit without me. stay by Adam; he'll keep you from getting crushed. I can't look out for you and throw punches at the same time"

"crushed?"

"there's going to be more people here tonight. Brandy Hoffman is from state. They have their own circle there. It will be our crowd and their crowd, so the rooms gonna get crazy"

"are you nervous?" I asked

She smiled, looking at me "no, you look a little nervous though"

"maybe" I admitted

"if it'll make you feel better, I won't let her touch me. I won't even let her get one hit in for her fans"

"how are you going to manage that?"

She shrugged "I usually let them get one in to make it look fair"

"you….? You let people hit you?"

"how much fun would it be if I just massacred someone and they never got a punch in? it's not good for business, no one would bet against me"

"what a load of crap" I said crossing my arms

Ashley raised an eyebrow "you think I'm yakin your chain?"

"I find it hard to believe that you only get hit when you let them hit you"

"would you like to make a wager on that, Spencer Carlin?" she smiled, her eyes animated

I smiled "I'll take that bet. I think she'll get one in on you"

"and if she doesn't? what do I win?" she asked, I shrugged as the yelling on the other side of the wall grew to a roar. Adam greeted the crowd and then went over the rules

Ashley's mouth stretched into a wide grin "if you win, I'll go without sex for a month" I raised an eyebrow and she smiled again "but if I win, you have to stay with me for a month"

"what? I'm staying with you anyway! What kind of bet is that?" I shrieked over the noise

"they fixed the boilers at Morgan today" Ashley said with a smile and a wink

A smirk softened my expression as Adam called Ashley's name "anything is worth watching you try abstinence for a change"

Ashley kissed my cheek and then walked out standing tall. I followed behind and we crossed into the next room. I was startled by the number of people packed together in the small space. It was standing room only but the shoving and shouting only amplified once we entered the room. Ashley nodded in my direction and then Adams hand was on my shoulder pulling me to his side

I leaned into Adams ear "I've got two on Ashley" I said

Adams eyebrows shot up as he watched me pull two Benjamin'sfrom my pocket. He held out his palm and I slapped the bills into his hand

"you're not the Goody two-shoes I thought you were" he said giving me a once-over

Brandy was at least a foot taller than Ashley and I gulped when I saw them stand toe-to-toe. Brandy was massive twice Ashley's size and solid muscle. I couldn't see Ashley's expression, but it was obvious Brandy was out for blood

Adam pressed his lips against my ear "you might want o plug your ears kiddo"

I cupped my hands on each side of my head and Adam sounded the horn. Instead of attacking, Ashley took a few steps back. Brandy swung and Ashley dodged to the right. Brandy swung again and Ashley ducked and sidestepped to the other side.

"what the hell this aint a boxing match Ashley!" Adam yelled

Ashley landed a punch to brandy's nose. The volume in the basement was deafening then. Ashley sand a left hook into Brandy's jaw and my hands flew over my mouth when Brandy attempted a few more punches each one catching air. Brandy fell against her entourage when Ashley elbowed her in the face. Just when I thought it was almost over, Brandy came out swinging again. throw after throw, brandy couldn't seem to keep up. Both women were covered in sweat and I gasped when Brandy missed another punch slamming her hand into a cement pillar. When she folded over, cradling her fist beneath her, Ashley went in for the kill.

She was relentless, first bringing her knee to Brandy's face and then pummeling her over and over until Brandy stumbled and hit the ground. The noise level boomed as Adam left my side to throw the red square on Brandy's bloodied face.

Ashley disappeared behind her fans and I pressed my back against the wall feeling my way to the doorway we came in. reaching the lantern was a huge relief. I worried about being knocked down and trampled.

My eyes focused on the doorway waiting for the crowd to pill into the small room. After several minutes and no sign of Ashley I prepared to retrace my steps to the window. with the number of people trying to leave at once it wasn't safe enough to chance wandering around.

Just as I stepped into the darkness, footsteps crunched against the loose concrete on the floor. Ashley for me in panic

"pidge!"

"I'm here!" I called out, running into her arms

Ashley looked at me and frowned "you scared the shit out of me! I almost had to start another fight just to get to you…..I finally get here and you're gone"

"I'm glad you're back, I wasn't looking forward to trying to find my way in the dark"

All worry left her face and she smiled widely "I believe you lost a bet"

Adam stomped in, looked at me and the glowered at Ashley "we need to talk"

Ashley winked at me "stay put I'll be right back"

They disappeared into the darkness. Adam raised his voice a few times but I couldn't make out what he was saying. Ashley returned shoving a wad cash into her pocket and then she offered a smile "you're going to need more clothes"

"you're really going to make me do this for a month?"

"would you have me go without sex for a month?"

I laughed, knowing I would, "we better stop at Morgan"

Ashley beamed "this should be interesting"

As Adam passed he slammed my winnings into my palm and then merged into the dissipating mob. Ashley raised an eyebrow "you put in?"

I smiled and shrugged "I thought I should get the full experience."

She led me to the window and the crawled out turning to help me up and out into the fresh night air. The crickets were chirping in the shadows, stopping just long enough to let us pass. The monkey grass that lined the sidewalk waved in the gentle breeze, reminding me of the sound the ocean makes when I wasn't quite close enough to hear the waves breaking. It wasn't too hot or too cold; it was the perfect night.

"why on earth would you want me to stay with you?" I asked

Ashley shrugged, shoving her hands in her pockets "I don't know. Everything's better when you're around"

The warm and fuzzies I felt from her words quickly faded with the sight of the red blotchy mess on her shirt "ew, you have blood all over you"

Ashley looked down with indiffence and then opened the door, gesturing for me to walk in. I breezed by Kara, who studied on her bed, held captive by the textbooks that surrounded her.

"the boilers were fixed this morning" she said

"I heard" I said, rifling through my closet

"hi" Ashley said to Kara

Kara's face twisted and she scanned Ashley's sweaty, bloody form

"nice to meet you" Kara said, pushing her glassed up the bridge of her nose. She glanced at my building bags "are you moving out?"

"nope, lost a bet"

Ashley burst into laughter grabbing my bags "ready?"

"yeah, how am I going to get all of this to you apartment, we're on your bike"

Ashley smiled and pulled out her cell phone. she carried my luggage to the street and minutes later Aiden's black vintage charger pulled up.

The passenger side window rolled down and Kyla poked her head out "hey chickie!"

"hey yourself. The boilers are working again in Morgan. Are you staying with Aid?"

She winked "yeah, I thought I'd stay tonight. I heard you lost a bet"

Before I could answer. Ashley shut the trunk and Aid sped off with Kyla squealing as she fell back into the car. We walked to her Harley and she waited for me to settle into my seat. I wrapped my arms around her she rested her hand over mine.

"I'm glad you were there tonight, Pidge. I've never had so much fun at a fight in my life"

I perched my chin on her shoulder and smiled "that was because you were trying to win our bet"

She angled her neck to face me. "damn right I was" there was no amusement in her eyes she was serious and she wanted me to see it too.

My eyebrows shot up "is that why you were in such a bad mood today? Because you knew they'd fixed the boilers and I would be leaving tonight?"

Ashley didn't answer; she only smiled as she started her motorcycle. The drive to the apartment was uncharacteristically slow. At every stop light, Ashley would either cover my hands with hers or she would rest her hand on my knee. The lines were blurring again and I wondered how we would spend a month together tangling in a way I never imagined.

When we arrived in the apartment parking lot, Aidens charger sat in its usual spot. I stood in front of the steps "I always hate it when they're home for a while. I feel we're going to interrupt them"

"get use to it. This is your place for the next four weeks" Ashley smiled and turned her back to me "get on"

"what?" I smiled

"c'mon, I'll carry you up"

I giggled and hopped onto her back, interlacing my fingers in her chest as she she ran up the stairs. Kyla's opened the door before we made it to the top and smiled

"look at you two. If I didn't know better…."

"knock it off ky" Aiden said from the couch

Kyla smiled as if she'd too much and then opened the door wide so we could both fit through. Ashley collapsed on the recliner and I squealed when she leaned against me

"you're awfully cheerful this evening, Ash. What gives?" Kylaprompted

I leaned over to see her face; I'd never seen her so pleased.

"I just won a shit load of money, Ky. Twice as much as I thought I would. What's not to be happy about?"

Kyla grinned "no it's something else." She said watching Ashley's hand as she petted my thigh. She was right, she was different. There was an air of peace around her almost as if some kind of new contentment had settled into her soul.

"Ky" Aiden warned

"fine I'll talk about something else. Didn't Parker invite you to the Sig Tau party this weekend, Spence?"

Ashley's smile vanished and she turned to me waiting for ananswer

"er... yeah? Aren't we all going?"

"I'll be there" Aiden said distracted by the television

"and that means I'm going" Kyla said looking expectantly at Ashley

Ashley watched me for a moment and then nudged my leg "is he picking you up or something?"

"no he just told me about the party"

Kyla's mouth spread into a mischievous grin, almost bobbing in anticipation "he said he'd see you there, though. He's really cute"

Ashley shot an irritated glance at Kyla direction and then looked to me "are you going?"

"I told him I would" I shrugged "are you going?"

"yeah" she said without hesitation

Aiden's attention turned to Ashley then "you said last week you weren't"

"I changed my mind, Aid. What's the problem?"

"nothing" he grumbled, retreating to his bedroom

Kyla frowned at Ashley "you know what the problem is" she said "why don't you quit driving him crazy and get it over with" she joined Aiden in his room and their voices were reduced to murmuring behind closed door

"well I'm glad everyone else knows" I said

Ashley stood up "I'm going to shower"

"is there something going on with them" I asked

"no, he's just paranoid"

"it's because of us" I guessed. Ashley eyes lit up and she nodded

"what?" I asked, eyeing her suspiciously

"you're right. It's because of us. Don't fall asleep, okay?" I wanna talk to you about something"

She walked backward a few steps and then disappeared behind the bathroom door. I twisted my hair around my fingers mulling over the way she emphasized the word "us" and the look on her face when she'd said it. I wonder if there had ever been lines at all, and if I was the only one who considered Ashley and I just friends anymore

Aiden burst out of his room and Kyla ran after him "aid, don't!" she pleaded

He looked back to the bathroom door then to me. his voice was low but angry "you promised, Spencer. When I told you to pare judgment, I didn't mean for you two to get involved! I thought you were just friends!"

"we are" I said, shaken by his surprise attack

"no, you're not!" he fumed

Kyla touched his shoulder "baby, I told you it will be fine"

He pulled away from her grip "why are you pushing this Ky? I told you what's going to happen!"

She grabbed his face with both hands "and I told you it won't! Don't you trust me?"

Aiden sighed, looked at her, at me, and then stomped into his room

Kyla fell into the recliner beside me and puffed "I just can't get it into his head that whether you and Ashley work out or not, it won't affect us, but he's been burned too many times he doesn't believe me"

"what are you talking about Kyla? Ashley and I aren't together, we are just friends. You heard her earlier…. SHe's not interested in me that way"

"you heard that?"

"well, yeah"

"and you believe it?"

I shrugged "it doesn't matter. It'll never happen. she told me she doesn't see me like that, anyway. Besides she's a total commitment phone, I'd be hard pressed to find a girlfriend outside of you that she hasn't slept with and I can't keep up with her mood swings. I can't believe Aiden thinks otherwise."

"because not only does he know Ashley… he's talked to Ashley, Spence"

"what do you mean?"

"ky?" Aiden called from the bedroom

Kyla sighed "you're my best friend I think I know you better than you know yourself sometimes I see you two together and the only difference between me and Aiden and you and Ashley is that we're having sex. Other than that? no difference"

"there is a huge diffrence. Is Aiden bringing home different girls every night? Are you going to the party tomorrow to hang out with a guy with definite dating potential? You know I can't get with Ashley, Ky. I don't why we're discussing it"

Kyla's expression turned to disappointment "I'm not seeing things Spencer. You have spent almost every moment with her for the last month. Admit it you have feelings for her"

"let it go, ky" Ashley said tightening her towel around herself

Kyla and I jumped at the sound of Ashley's voice and when my eyes met hers, I could see the happiness was gone. She walked down the hall without another word and Kyla looked at me with a sad expression

"I think you're making a mistake" she whispered "you don'thave to go to that party to meet a guy, you've got her, who's crazy about you right here" she said leaving me alone

I rocked into the recliner, letting everything that had happened in the last week replay in my mind. Aiden was angry with me. Kyla was disappointed in me and Ashley….she went from being happier than I'd ever seen her to so offended that she was speechless. Too nervous to crawl into bed with her. I watched the clock change from minute to minute.

An hour had passed when Ashley came out of her room and down the hall. When she rounded the corner, I expected her to ask me to come to bed but she was dressed and had her bike keys in her hand. Her sunglasses were hiding her eyes and she popped a cigarette in her mouth before grabbing the knob of the door

"you're leaving?" I asked sitting up "where are you going?"

"out" she said, yanking the door open and then slamming it closed behind her.

I fell back in the recliner and huffed. I had somehow become the villain and had no idea how I'd manage to get there.

When the clock above the television read two a.m., I finally resigned myself to going to bed. The mattress was lonely without her and the idea of calling her cell kept creeping into my mind. I had nearly fallen asleep when Ashley's motorcycle pulled into the parking lot. Two car doors shut shortly after and then several pairs of footsteps climbed the stairs. Ashley fumbled with the lock and then the door opened. She laughedand mumbled and then I heard not one but two female voices. Their giggling was interrupted by the distinct sounds of kissing and moaning. My heart sank and I was instantly angry that I felt that way. My eyes clenched shut when one of the girls squealed and then I was sure the next sound was the three of them collapsing on the couch.

I considered asking Kyla for her keys but Aiden's door was directly in view of the couch and I couldn't stomach witnessing the picture that went along with the noises in the living room. I buried my head under the pillow and then shut my eyes when the door popped open. Ashley walked across the room. Opened the top night-table drawer, grabbed something and then shut the drawer jogging down the hall. The girls giggling for what seemed like half an hour and then it was quiet.

Seconds later, moans, humming and shouting filled the apartment. It sounded as if a pornographic movie were being filmed in the living room. I covered my face with my hands and shook my head. Whatever lines had blurred or disappeared in the last week an apparent stone wall had gone up in their place. I shook off my ridiculous emotions, forcing myself to relax. Ashley was Ashley and we were without a doubt friends and only friends.

The shouting and other nauseating noises quieted down after an hour, followed by whinnying and then grumbling by the women after being dismissed. Ashley showered and then collapsed onto her side of the bed, turning her back to me. even after her shower, she smelled like she'd drank enough whiskey to sedate a horse and I was livid the she's driven her bike home in such a state.

After the awkwardness faded and the anger weakened, I still couldn't sleep. When Ashley breaths were even I sat to look at the clock. The sun was going to rise in less than an hour. I ripped the covers off me, walked down the hall and took a blanket from the hall cabinet. The only evidence of Ashley's threesome was pair of underwear on the floor; I stepped over them and fell into the recliner.

I closed my eyes. when I opened them again, Kyla and Aiden were sitting quietly on the couch watching muted television. The sun lit in the apartment and I cringed when my back complained at my attempted movement.

Kyla's attention darted to me "Spence?" she said, rushing to my side. She watched me with wary eyes. she was waiting for anger or tears or another emotionally charged outburst.

Aiden looked miserable "I'm sorry about last night, Spence. This is my fault"

I smiled "its okay Aiden. You don't have to apologize"

Kyla and Aiden traded glanced and then she grabbed my hand "Ashley went to the store, she is….ugh, it doesn't matter what she is. I packed you stuff and I'll take you to your dorm before she gets home so you don't have to deal with her."

It wasn't until that moment that I felt like crying; I had been kicked out, I worked to keep my voice smooth before I spoke

"so I have time to shower?"

Kyla shook her head "let's just go, Spence. I don't want you to have to see her. she doesn't deserve to-"

The door flew open and Ashley walked in, her arms laden with grocery sacks. She walked straight into the kitchen, furiously working to get the cans and boxes into the cabinets.

"when Pidge wake up, let me know okay?" she said in a soft voice "I got spaghetti and pancakes and strawberries and that oatmeal shit with the chocolate packets and she likes Fruity Pebbles cereal, right Ky?" she asked turning

When she saw me, she froze. After an awkward pause her expression melted and her voice was smooth and sweet "hey, Pidge"

I couldn't have been more confused if I had woken up in a foreign country. Nothing made sense. At first I thought I had been evicted and then Ashley comes home with bags full of my favorite foods.

She took a few steps into the living room, nervously shoving her hands in her pockets "you hungry, Spence? I'll make you some pancakes. Or there's, uh…there's some oatmeal. And I got you some of that pink foamy shit that you shave with and a hair dryer and a….a… just a sec, it's in here" she said rushing to the bedroom

The door opened and shut and the she rounded the corner, the color gone from her face. She took a deep breath and her eyebrows pulled in "your stuff is packed"

"I know" I said

"you're leaving" she said, defeated

I looked to Kyla who glowered at Ashley as is she could kill her "you actually expected her to stay?"

"baby" Aiden whispered

"don't fucking start with me Aid. Don't you dare defend her to me." Kyla seethed

Ashley looked desperate "I am sorry, Pidge. I don't even know what to say"

"com on Spence" Kyla said. She stood and pulled on my arm

Ashley took a step but Kyla pointed a finger at her "so help me god, Ashley! If you try to stop her. I will douse you with gasoline and light you on fire while you sleep!"

"Kyla" Aiden said sounding a bit desperate himself. I could see that he was torn between his cousin and the women he loved and I felt terrible for him. The situation was exactly what he had tried to avoid all along.

"I'm fine" I said exasperated by the tension in the room.

"what do you mean, you're fine?" Aiden asked almost hopeful

I rolled my eyes "Ashley brought women home from the bar last night, so what?"

Kyla looked worried "hu-uh. Spencer. Are you saying you're okay with what happened?"

I looked to all of them "Ashley can bring home whoever she wants. It's her apartment"

Kyla starred at me as if I'd lost my mind. Aiden was on the verge of a smile and Ashley looked worse than before

"you didn't pack your things?" Ashley asked

I shook my head and looked at the clock; it was after two in the afternoon. "no and now I'm going to have to unpack it all. I still have to eat and shower and get dressed…." I said walking into the bathroom. Once the door closed behind me I leaned against it and slid down to the floor. I was sure I had pissed off Kyla beyond repair but I'd made Aiden a promise and I intended to keep my word.

A soft knock tapped on the door above me "pidge?" Ashley asked

"yeah?" I said , trying to sound normal

"you're staying?"

"I can go if you want me to, but a bet's a bet"

The door vibrated with a soft bump of Ashley's forehead against it "I don't want you to leave, but I wouldn't blame you if you did"

"are you saying I'm released from the bet?"

There was a long pause "if I say yes, will you leave?"

"well, yea. I don't live here silly" I said forcing a small smile

"then no, the bet still in effect"

I looked up and shook my head, feeling tears burn my eyes. I had no idea why I was crying but I couldn't stop "can I take a shower now?"

"yeah…" she sighed

I heard Kyla's shoes enter the hall and stomp by Ashley's "you're a selfish bitch" she growled, slamming Aiden's door behind her

I pushed myself up from the floor turned on the shower and then undressed, pulling the curtain closed behind me

After another knock on the door Ashley cleared her throat

"Pidgeon? I brought some of you stuff"

" just set it on the sink, I'll get it"

Ashley walked in and shut the door behind her "I was mad. I heard you spitting out everything that is wrong with me to Kyla and it pissed me off. I just meant to go out and have a few drinks and try to figure some things out but before I knew it I was piss drunk and those girls…." She paused "I woke up this morning and you weren't in bed and when I found you on the recliner and saw the underwear on the floor, I felt sick"

"you could have just asked me instead of spending all that money at the grocery store just to bribe me to stay"

"I don't care about the money Pidge. I was afraid you'd leave and never speak to me again"

I cringed at her explanation. I hadn't stopped to think how I would make her feel to hear me talk about how wrong for me she was and now the situation was too messed up to salvage.

"I didn't mean to hurt your feelings" I said standing under the water

"I know you didn't and I know it doesn't matter what I say now because I fucked things up…just like I always do"

"Ash?"

"yeah?"'

"don't drive drunk on your bike anymore, okay?"I waited for a full minute until she finally took a deep breath and spoke "yeah, okay" she said shutting the door behind her.


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry! I taught I had lost my book but my friend likes to come over and take random books from my bookshelf to read, and she took Beautiful Disaster without me knowing about it but I finally have it back so you can blame the delay on my friend but other than that here you go. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own SON or Beautiful Disaster

"Come in" I called, hearing a knock on the door.

Ashley froze on the doorway "wow"

I smiled and looked down at my dress. A bustier that elongated into a short skirt, it was admittedly more daring than what I had worn in the past. The material was thin, black and see through over a nude shell. Parker would be at that party and I had every intention of being noticed.

"you look amazing" she said as I slid on my heels

I gave her tight black strapless dress that curved her body in oh so many ways an approving nod "you look nice too" while my insides jumped of excitement on how short her dress was.

Aiden and Kyla waited for us in the living room.

"parker is going to piss himself when he sees you" kyla giggled as Aiden led the way to the car.

Ashley opened the door and slid into the backseat of Aidens Charger. Although we had occupied that seat countless times before it was suddenly akward to sit next to her.

Cars lined the street; some even parked in the front lawn. The house was bursting at the seams and people were still walking down the street from the dorms. Aiden pulled into the grass lot in the back and Kyla and I followed Aiden and Ashley inside.

Ashley brought me a red plastic cup full of beer and then leaned in to whispers in my ear "don't take those from anyone but me and Aid. I don't want anyone slipping anything into your drink"

I rolled my eyes "no one is going to put anything in my drink, Ashley"

"just don't drink anything that doesn't come from me okay? You're not in Ohio anymore, Spence"

"I haven't heard that one before" I said sarcastically taking a drink

An hour had passed and Parker was still a no-show. Kyla and Aiden were dancing to a slow song in the living room when Ashley tugged my hand "wanna dance?"

"no thanks" I said, what? I'm still pissed for some reason

Her face fell.

I touched her shoulder "I'm just tire, Ash"

She put her hand on mine and began to speak but when I looked beyond her I saw parker. Ashley notices my expression and turned

"hey, Spence! You made it!" parker smiled

"yeah, we've been here for an hour or so" I said pulling my hand back from under Ashleys

"you look incredible!" he yelled over the music

"thanks" I grinned, glancing over to Ashley . her lips pressed together and a line had formed between her eyebrows

Parker nodded towards the living room and smiled "you wanna dance?"

I wrinkled my nose and shook my head "nah, I'm kinda tired"

Parker looked at Ashley then "I thought you weren't coming"

"I changed my mind" Ashley said irritated that she had to explain

"I see that" paker said looking to me " you wanna get some air?"

I nodded and the followed parker up the stairs. He paused reaching to take my hand as we climbed to the second floor. When we reached the top he pulled opened a pair of French doors to the balcony

"are you cold" he asked

"A little chilly" I said smiling when he pulled off his jacket and covered my shoulders "thanks"

"You're here with Ashley?"

"we rode together"

Parkers mouth stretched across his face in a broad grin and then he looked out onto the lawn. A group of girls were in a huddle ,arms hooked together to fight the cold. Crepe paper and beer cans littered the grass along with empty bottles of liquor. Amid the clutter, Sig Tau brothers were standing around their masterpiece a pyramid of kegs decorated with white lights

Parker shook his head "this place is going to be destroyed in the morning. The cleanup crew is going to be busy"

"You have a cleanup crew?"

"yea" he smiled "we call them freshmen"

"poor Aid"

"he's not on it. He gets a pass because he's Ashleys cousin and he doesn't live in the house"

"do you live in the house?"

Parker nodded "the last two years I need to get an apartment, though I need a quieter place to study"

"let me guess…Business Major?"

"biology, with a minor in Anatomy. I've got one more year left, take the MCAT and then hopefully I'm off to Harvard Med"

"you already know you're in?"

"my dad went to Harvard. I mean, I don't know for sure but he's a generous alumnus, if you know what I mean. I carry a 4.0got a 2200 on my SAT's, thirty-six on my ACT's. I'm in a good position for a spot."

"your dad is a doctor?"

Parker confirmed it with a good natured smiled "orthopedic surgeon"

"impressive"

"how about you?"

"undecided"

"Typical freshmen answer"

I sighed in dramatic fashion "I guess I just blew my chances of being exceptional"

"oh you don't have to worry about that. I noticed you on the first day of class. What are you doing in calculus three as a freshmen?"

I smiled and twisted my hair from my fingers "math is sort of easy for me. I packed on the classes in high school and took two summer courses in Wichita State"

"now that impressive" he said

We stood on the balcony for over an hour talking about everything from local eateries to how I became such good friends with Ashley

"I wouldn't mention it but the two of you seem to be the topic of conversation"

"great" I murmured

"it's just unusual for Ashley . she doesn't befriends women. She tend to make enemies of them more often than not"

"oh I didn't know. I've seen more than a few who either have short term memory loss or are too forgiving when it comes to her"

Parker laughed. His white teeth gleamed against his golden tan. "people just don't understand your relationship. You have to admit it's a bit ambiguous"

"are you asking me if im sleeping with her?"

He smiled "you wouldn't be here with her if you were. I've known her since I was fourteen and I'm well aware of how she operates. I'm curious about your friendship though"

"it is what it is " I shrugged "we hang out, eat, watch tv, study and argue. That's about it"

Parker laughed shaking his head at my honesty. "I've heard you are the only person allowed to put Ashley in her place. That's an honorable title"

"whatever that means. She's not as bad as everyone maker her out to be"

The sky turned purple and then pink as the sun broke above the horizon. Parker looked at his watch glancing over the ailing to the thinning crowd on the lawn "looks like the partys over"

"I better track down Aiden and Kyla"

"would you mind if I drove you home?" He asked

I tried to subdue my excitement "not at all. I'll let Kyla know" I walked through the doors and then cringed before turning around "do you know where Ashley lives?"

Parkers thick brown eyebrows pulled in "yes why?"

"that's were I'm staying" I said bracing myself for his reaction

"you're staying at Ashleys?"

"I sort of lost a bet, so I'm there for a month"

"a month?"

"yes"

"then I'll take you to Ashley's" he smiled

I trotted down the stairs to find Kyla and passed a sullen Ashley, who seemed annoyed with the drunken girl speaking to her. she followed me into the hall as I tugged on Kylas dress

"you guys can go ahead Parker offered me a ride home"

"what?" kyla said with excitement in her eyes

"what?" Ashley asked angry

"is there a problem?" kyla asked her

She glared at Kyla and then pulled me around the corner. Her jaw flitting under he skin "you don't even know him"

I pulled my arm from her grip "this is none of your business, Ashley"

"the hell if its not. I'm not letting you ride home with a complete stranger. What if he tried something on you?"

"good! He's cute!"

Ashleys expression contorted from surprised to anger, and I braced for what she might say next "Parker Hayes, Pidge? Really? Parker Hayes?" she repeated with disdain "what kind of name is that anyways?"

I crossed my arms "stop it Ash you're being a jerk"

She leaned in seeming flustered "I'll kill him if he touches you"

"I like him" I said emphasizing every word

She seemed stunned at my confession and then her features turned severe. "fine. If he ends up holding you down in the backseat of his car don't come crying to me"

My mouth popped open I was offended and instantly furious "Don't worry I wont " I said shouldering past her.

Ashley grabbed my arm and sighed peering at me over her shoulder "I didn't mean it Spence. If he hurts you- if he even makes you feel uncomfortable you let me know"

The anger subsided and my shoulders fell "I know you didn't"

Parker rounded the corner and pushed his hands inside his pockets offering elbow to me "all set?"

Ashley clenched her jaw and I stepped on the other side of Parker to distract him from Ashleys expression "yeah, lets go" I took Parkers arm and walked with him a few steps before turning back to say goodbye to Ashley but she was glowering at the back of Parkers head. Her eyes darted to me and then her features turned smooth

"stop it" I said though my teeth , following parker thought the remnants of the crowd to his car

"I'm the silver one" the headlights of his car blinked twice when he hit the keyless entry. He opened the passenger side door and I laughed.

"you drive a Porsche?"

"she is not just a Porsche. She is a Porsche 911 Gt. There's a difference."

"let me guess, it's the love of your life?" I said quoting Ashley's statement about her motorcycle

"no, it's a car. The love of my life will be a woman with my last name"

I allowed a small smile, trying not to be overly affected by his sentiment, he held my hand to help me into the car, and when he slid behind the wheel he leaned his head against the his seat and smiled at me.

"what are you doing tonight?"

"tonight?" I asked

"it's morning. I want to ask you to dinner before someone else beats me to it"

A grin extended across my face "I don't have any plans"

"I'll pick you up at six?"

"okay" I said watching him slink his fingers between mine. Parker took me straight to Ashleys, keeping to the speed limit, my hand in his. He pulled behind the Harley and like before he opened my door. Once we reached the landing he leaned down to kiss my cheek.

"get some rest. I'll see you tonight" he whispered in my ear

"bye" I said turning the knob. When I pushed, the door gave way and I surged forward.

Ashley grabbed my arm before I fell "easy there, Carlin"

I turned to see Parker staring at us with an uncomfortable expression. He leaned over to peer into the apartment "any militated, stranded girls in there I need to give a ride?"

Ashley glared at Parker "don't start with me"

Parker smiled and winked "I'm always giving her a hard time. I don't get to quite as often since she realized it's easier if she can get them to drive their own cars"

"I guess that does simplify things" I say teasing Ashley

"Not funny, Pidge"

"Pidge?" Parker asked

"it's uh….. short for Pidgeon. It's just a nickname, I don't even know where she came up with it" I said. It was the first time I'd felt akward about the name Ashley had bestowed on me the night we met.

"you're going to have to fill me in when you find out, sounds like a good story." Parker smiled "Night, Spence"

"don't you mean goodmorning?" I said watching trot down the stairs

"that, too" he called back with a sweet smile

Ashley slammed the door, and I had to jerk my head back before it caught me in the face. "what?" I snapped

Ashley shook her head and walked to her room. I followed her and then hopped on one foot to pull off my heel "he is nice, Ash"

She sighed and walked over to me "you're gonna hurt yourself" she said hooking her arm around my waist with one hand and pulling off my heels with the other. She tossed them into the closet and then pulled off her dress making herself to bed like it was nothing. I couldn't help but stare for a second. I shook my head and went back to getting ready for bed.

I unzipped my dress and shimmied it over my hips, kicking it into the corner, I yanked a t-shirt over my head and then unsnapped my bra, pulling it through the sleeve of my shirt. When I wrapped my hair into a bun on top of my head, I noticed her staring.

"I'm sure there's nothing I have that you don't have" I said rolling my eyes. I slid under the covers and settled against my pillow, curling into a ball. She got up and I waited while she stood quietly for a moment. I had my back to her, so I wondered what she was doing, standing beside the bed in silence. The bed concaved when she finally crawled onto the mattress beside me and I stiffened when her hand rested on my hip.

"I missed a fight tonight" she said "adam called. I didn't go"

"why?" I said turning to face her

"I wanted to make sure you got home"

I wrinkled my nose "you didn't have to babysit me"

She traced the length of my arm with her finger, sending shivers up my spine "I know. I guess I still feel bad about the other night"

"I told you I didn't care"

She sat up on her elbow a dubious frown on her face "is that why you slept on the recliner? Because you didn't care?"

"I couldn't fall asleep after your….friends left"

"you slept just fine in the recliner. Why didn't you sleep with me?"

"you mean next to a girl who still smelled like the pair of barflies she had just sent home? I don't know! How selfish of me!"

Ashley winced "I said I'm sorry"

"and I said I didn't care, Good night" I said turning over. Several moments of silence passed. She slid her hand across the top of my pillow, resting her hand on mine. She caressed the delicate pieces of skin between my fingers and then she pressed her lips against my hair

"as worried as I was that you'd never speak to me again…..I think it's worse that you're indifferent"

My eyes closed "what do you want from me, Ashley? You don't want me to be upset about what you did, but you want me to care. You tell Kyla that you don't want to date me but you get so pissed off when I say the same thing that you storm out and get ridiculously drunk. You don't make sense"

"Is that why you said those things to Kyla? because I said I wouldn't date you?"

My teeth clenched, she had just insinuated that I was playing games with her. I formed the most direct answer I could think of "no, I meant what I said. I just didn't mean it as an insult"

"I just said that because" she scratched the back of her neck nervously "I don't want to ruin anything. I wouldn't even know how to go about being who you deserve. I was just trying to get it worked out in my head"

"whatever that means. I have to get some sleep. I have a date tonight"

"with Parker?" she asked, anger seeping through her tone

"yes, can I please go to sleep?"

"sure" she said, shoving herself off the bed and them slamming the door behind her. the old recliner squeaked as she sat down and then muffled voices from the television drifted down the hall. I forced my eyes shut and tried to calm down enough to doze off, even if it was just for a few hours.

The clock read three p.m. when I peeled my eyes open. I grabbed a towel and my robe and then trudged into the bathroom. As soon as I closed the shower curtain, the door opened and shut. I waited for someone to speak but the only sound was the toilet lid smacking against porcelain

"Ashley?"

"Nope, its me " kyla said

"so you have to pee in here? You have your own bathroom"

"Aiden has been in there for half an hour with the beer shits. Not going in there"

"nice"

"I hear you have a date tonight. Ashley is pissed" she said

"at six! He is so sweet Ky. He's just….." I trialed off, sighing. I was gushing and it wasn't like me to gush. I kept thinking about how perfect he had been since the moment we'd met. He was exactly what I needed; the polar opposite of Ashley.

"Rendered you speechless?" she giggled

I poked my head from the curtain "I dint want to come home! I could've talked to him forever"

"sounds promising. Its kind of weird that you're here though?"

I ducked under the water, rinsing away the suds "I explained it to him"

The toilet flushed and the faucet turned on making the water flush cold for a moment. I cried out and the door flew open

"Pidge?" Ashley said

Kyla laughed "I just flushed the toilet, Ash, calm down"

"oh, you all right Spence?"

"I'm great get out" the door shut again and I sighed "it is too much to ask for locks on the doors" Kyla didn't answer

"ky?"

"It's really too bad you two couldn't get on the same page. You're the only girl that could have…." she sighed. "Never mind. It doesn't matter, now."

I turned off the water and wrapped myself in a towel. "You're as bad as she is. It's a sickness…no one here makes sense. You're pissed at her, remember?"

"I know," she nodded.

I turned on my new hairdryer and began the process of primping for my date with Parker. I curled my hair, and painted my nails and lips a deep shade of red. It was a bit much for a first date. I frowned at myself in the mirror. It wasn't Parker I was trying to impress. I wasn't in a position to be insulted when Ashley accused me of playing games, after all.

Taking one last glance at myself in the mirror, guilt washed over me. Ashley was trying so hard, and I was being a stubborn brat. I walked out into the living room and Ashley smiled, not the reaction I expected at all.

"You…are beautiful."

"Thank you," I said, rattled by the absence of irritation or jealousy in her voice.

Aiden whistled. "Nice choice, Spence. Guys dig red."

"And the curls are gorgeous," kyla added.

The doorbell chimed and Kyla smiled, waving with exaggerated excitement. "Have fun!"

I opened the door. Parker held a small bouquet of flowers, wearing slacks and a tie. His eyes did a quick once-over, from my dress to my shoes and then back up.

"You are the most beautiful creature I've ever seen," he said, enamored

I looked behind me to wave to Kyla, whose smile was so wide I could see every one of her teeth. Aiden had the expression of a proud father, and Ashley kept her eyes on the television.

Parker held out his hand, leading me to his shiny Porsche. Once we were inside, he let out a puff of air.

"What?" I asked.

"I have to say, I was a bit nervous about picking up the woman Ashley Davies is in love with…from her apartment. You don't know how many people have accused me of insanity today."

"Ashley is not in love with me. She can barely stand to be near me sometimes."

"Then it's a love/hate relationship? Because when I broke it to my brothers that I was taking you out tonight, they all said the same thing. She's been behaving so erratically—even more than usual— that they've all come to the same conclusion."

Parker shook his head as if I were utterly clueless. He rested his hand on mine. "We'd better go. I have a table waiting."

"Where?"

"Biasetti's. I took a chance…I hope you like Italian."

I raised one eyebrow. "Wasn't it short notice for reservations? That place is always packed."

"Well…it's our restaurant. Half, anyway."

"I like Italian," I smiled.

Parker drove to the restaurant at exactly the speed limit, using his turn signal appropriately, and slowing at a reasonable rate for each yellow light. When he spoke, he barely took his eyes from the road. When we arrived at the restaurant, I giggled

"What?" he asked.

"You're just…a very cautious driver. It's a good thing."

"Different from the back of Ashleys motorcycle?" he smiled.

I should have laughed, but the difference didn't feel like a good thing. "Let's not talk about Ashley tonight. Okay?"

"Fair enough," he said, leaving his seat to open my door.

We were seated right away at a table by a large, bay window. Although I was in a dress, I looked impoverished compared to the other women in the restaurant. They were dripping in diamonds, and wearing cocktail dresses. I'd never eaten anywhere so swanky.

We ordered, and Parker closed his menu, smiling at the waiter. "And bring us a bottle of the Allegrini Amarone, please."

"Yes, sir," the waiter said, taking our menus

"This place is unbelievable," I whispered, leaning against the table.

His green eyes softened. "Thank you, I'll let my father know you think so."

A woman approached our table. Her hair was pulled into a tight, blonde French bun, a gray streak interrupting the smooth wave of her bangs. I tried not to stare at the sparkling jewels resting around her neck, or those swaying back and forth on her ears, but they were made to be noticed. Her squinty, blue eyes targeted me.

She quickly turned away to look at my date. "Who's your friend, Parker?"

"Mother, this is Spencer Carlin. Spence this is my mother, Vivienne Hayes."

I extended my hand and she shook it once. In a well-practiced move, interest lit the sharp features of her face, and she looked to Parker. "Carlin?"

I gulped, worried that she had recognized the name.

Parker's expression turned impatient. "She's from Wichita, Mom. You don't know her family. She goes to Eastern."

"Oh?" Vivienne eyed me again. "Parker is leaving next year for Harvard."

"That's what he said. I think that's great. You must be very proud."

The tension around her eyes smoothed a bit, and the corners of her mouth turned up in a smug grin. "We are. Thank you."

I was amazed at how her words were so polite, and yet they dripped with insult. It wasn't a talent she had developed over night. Mrs. Hayes must have spent years impressing her superiority upon others.

"It's good to see you, Mom. Good night." She kissed his cheek, rubbed the lipstick off with her thumb and then returned to her table. "Sorry about that, I didn't know she would be here."

"It's fine. She seems…nice

Parker laughed. "Yes, for a piranha." I stifled a giggle, and he offered an apologetic smile. "She'll warm up. It just takes her awhile."

"Hopefully by the time you leave for Harvard."

We talked endlessly about the food, Eastern, calculus, and even about The Circle. Parker was charming, funny, and said all the right things. Various people approached Parker to greet him, and he always introduced me with a proud smile. He was regarded as a celebrity within the walls of the restaurant, and when we left, I felt the appraising eyes of everyone in the room.

"Now what?" I asked.

"I'm afraid I have a mid-term in Comparative Vertebrate Anatomy first thing Monday morning. I have some studying to do," he said, covering my hand with his.

"Better you than me," I said, trying not to seem too disappointed

He drove to the apartment, and then led me up the stairs by the hand.

"Thank you, Parker," I smiled. "I had a fantastic time."

"Is it too early to ask for a second date?"

"Not at all," I beamed.

"I'll call you tomorrow?"

"Sounds perfect."

Then came the moment of awkward silence. The element of dates I dread. To kiss or not to kiss, I hated that question.

Before I had a chance to wonder whether he would kiss me or not, he touched each side of my face and pulled me to him, pressing his lips against mine. They were soft and warm and nice. He pulled back once, and then kissed me again

"Talk to you tomorrow, Spen"

I waved, watching him walk down the steps to his car. "Bye."

Once again, when I turned the knob, the door yanked away and I fell forward. Ashley caught me, and I regained my footing.

"Would you stop that?" I said, closing the door behind me.

" Spen? What are you, a workout video?" he sneered.

" Pigeon ?" I said with the same amount of disdain. "An annoying bird that craps all over the sidewalk?"

"You like Pigeon," she said defensively. "It's a dove, an attractive girl, a winning card in poker, take your pick. You're my Pigeon."

I grabbed her arm to remove my heels, and then walked to her room. As I changed into my pajamas, I tried my best to stay mad at her. ashley sat on the bed and crossed her arms. "Did you have a good time?"

"I had," sigh , "a fantastic time. A perfect time. He's…" I couldn't think of an adequate word to describe him, so I just shook my head.

"He kissed you?"

I pressed my lips together and nodded. "He's got really soft lips."

Ashley recoiled. "I don't care what kind of lips he has."

"Trust me, it's important. I get so nervous with first kisses, too, but this one wasn't so bad."

"You get nervous about a kiss?" she asked, amused.

"Just first kisses. I loathe them."

"I'd loathe them, too, if I had to kiss Parker Hayes." I giggled and left for the bathroom to scrub the makeup from my face. Ashley followed, leaning against the door jamb. "So you're going out again?"

"Yep. He's calling me tomorrow." I dried my face and scampered down the hall, hopping into the bed.

Ashley stripped down to her boy short and sports bra , and sat down with her back to me. A bit slumped over, she looked exhausted. The lean muscles of her back stretched as she did, and she glanced back at me for a moment. "If you had such a good time, why are you home so early?"

"He has a big test on Monday."

Ashley wrinkled her nose. "Who cares?"

"He's trying to get into Harvard. He has to study."

She huffed, crawling onto her stomach. I watched her shove her hands under her pillow, seeming irritated. "Yeah, that's what he keeps telling everyone."

"Don't be an ass. He has priorities…I think it's responsible."

"Shouldn't his girl top his priorities?"

"I'm not his girl . We've been on one date, Ash," I scolded.

"So what did you guys do?" I shot her a dirty look and she laughed. "What? I'm curious!"

Seeing that he was sincere, I described everything, from the restaurant, to the food, to the sweet and funny things Parker said. I knew my mouth was frozen in a ridiculous grin, but I couldn't stop smiling while describing my perfect evening.

Ashley watched me with an amused smile while I blathered on, even asking questions. Although she seemed frustrated with the situation regarding Parker, I had the distinct feeling she enjoyed seeing me so happy. Ashley settled in on her side of the bed, and I yawned. We stared at each other for a moment before she sighed. "I'm glad you had a good time, Pidge. You deserve it."

"Thanks," I grinned. The ringtone of my cell phone reverberated from the night table, and I jerked up to look at the display.

"Hello?"

"It's tomorrow," Parker said.

I looked at the clock and laughed. It was twelve-oh-one. "It is."

"So what about Monday night?" he asked.

I covered my mouth for a moment, and then took a deep breath. "Uh, yeah. Monday night is great."

"Good. I'll see you Monday," he said. I could hear the smile in his voice.

I hung up and glanced at Ashley, who watched with mild annoyance. I turned away from her and curled into a ball, tensing with excitement.

"You're such a girl," Ashley said, turning her back to me.

I rolled my eyes and sighed.

SHe turned over, pulling me to face her "You really like Parker?"

"Don't ruin this for me, Ashley!"

SHe stared at me for a moment, and then shook her head, turning away once again. " Parker Hayes ," she sighed


	6. Chapter 6

yea, not going to lie but I didn't realize how much of a bitch it would make spencer look when I decided to sub the characters. but besides that Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own SON or Beautiful Disaster

Monday night's date met my every expectation. We ate Chinese food while I giggled at Parker's skills with chopsticks. When he brought me home, Ashley opened the door before he could kiss me. When we went out the following Wednesday night, Parker made sure to kiss me in the car.

Thursday at lunch, Parker met me in the cafeteria and surprised everyone when he sat in Ashley's spot. When Ashley finished her cigarette and came inside, she walked past Parker with indifference, sitting at the end of the table. Megan approached her, but was instantly disappointed when she waved her off. Everyone at the table was quiet after that, and I found it difficult to focus on anything Parker talked about.

"I'm assuming I just wasn't invited," Parker said, catching my attention.

"What?"

"I heard your birthday party is on Sunday. I wasn't invited?"

Kyla peeked at Ashley, who glared at Parker as if she was seconds away from mowing him down.

"It was a surprise party, Parker," Kyla said softly

"Oh," Parker said, cringing.

"You're throwing me a surprise party?" I asked Kyla.

She shrugged. "It was Ashley's idea. It's at Brazil's on Sunday. Six o'clock."

Parker's cheeks flushed a faint red. "I suppose I'm really not invited, now."

"No! Of course you are!" I said, holding his hand on top of the table. Twelve pairs of eyes zeroed in on our hands. I could see that Parker was just as uncomfortable with the attention as I was, so I let go and pulled my hands onto my lap.

Parker stood up. "I have a few things I need to do before class. I'll call you later."

"Okay," I said, offering an apologetic smile.

Parker leaned over the table and kissed my lips. The silence was cafeteria-wide, and Kyla elbowed me after Parker walked out.

"Isn't it creepy how everyone watches you?" she whispered. She glanced around the room with a frown. " What ?" Kyla yelled. "Mind your business, perverts!" One by one, heads turned away, and murmuring ensued.

I covered my eyes with my hands. "You know, before I was pathetic because I was thought to be Ashleys poor clueless girlfriend. Now I'm evil because everyone thinks I'm bouncing back and forth between Ashley and Parker like a ping pong ball." When Kyla didn't comment, I looked up. "What? Don't tell me you're buying into that crap, too!"

"I didn't say anything!" she said.

I stared at her in disbelief. "But that's what you think ?"

Kyla shook her head, but she didn't speak. The icy stares from the other students were suddenly apparent, and I stood up, walking to the end of the table.

"We need to talk," I said, tapping Ashleys shoulder. I tried to sound polite, but the anger bubbling inside me put an edge to my words. The entire student populace, including my best friend, thought I was juggling two Different persons. There was only one solution.

"So talk," Ashley said, popping something breaded and fried in her mouth.

I fidgeted, noticing the curious eyes of everyone within earshot. When Ashley still didn't move, I grabbed her arm and gave it a good tug. SHe stood up and followed me outside with a grin on her face.

"What, Pidge?" She said, looking at my hand on her arm and then at me.

"You've got to let me out of the bet," I begged.

Her face fell. "You want to leave ? Why? What'd I do?"

"You didn't do anything, Ash. Haven't you noticed everyone staring? I am quickly becoming the pariah of Eastern U."

Ashley shook her head and lit a cigarette. "Not my problem.

"Yes , it is. Parker said everyone thinks he has a death wish because you're in love with me."

Ashleys eyebrows shot up and she choked on the puff of smoke she'd just inhaled. "People are saying that?" she said between coughs.

I nodded. SHe looked away with wide-eyes, taking another drag.

"Ashley! You have to release me from the bet! I can't date Parker and live with you at the same time. It looks terrible!"

"So quit dating Parker."

I glared at her. "That's not the problem and you know it."

"Is that the only reason you want to leave? Because of what people are saying?"

"At least before I was clueless and you were the bad guy," I grumbled

"Answer the question, Pidge."

"Yes!"

Ashley looked beyond me to the students entering and leaving the cafeteria. She was deliberating, and I grew impatient while she took her time making her decision.

Finally, she stood tall, resolved. "No."

I shook my head, sure that I had misunderstood. "Excuse me?"

"No. You said so yourself: a bet's a bet. After the month's up, you'll be off with Parker, he'll become a doctor, you'll get married and have your two-point-five children and I'll never see you again." SHe grimaced at her own words. "I still have three weeks. I'm not giving that up for lunch room gossip."

I looked through the glass window to see the entire cafeteria watching us. The unwelcome attention made my eyes burn. I shouldered passed her to walk to my next class.

"Pigeon," Ashley called after me.

I didn't turn around.

That night, Kyla sat on the tile floor of the bathroom, babbling about the boys while I stood in front of the mirror and pulled my hair into a ponytail. I was only half-listening, thinking about how patient Ashley had been—for Ashley—knowing she didn't like the idea of Parker picking me up from her apartment every other night.

The expression on Ashleys face flashed in my mind when I asked her to let me out of the bet, and again when I told her people were saying she was in love with me. I couldn't stop wondering why she didn't deny it.

"Well, Aid thinks you're being too hard on her. sHe's never had anyone she's

cared enough to—,"

Ashley poked her head in and smiled as she watched me fuss with my hair. "Wanna grab dinner?" She asked

Kyla stood up to look at herself in the mirror, combing her fingers through her golden hair. "Aiden wants to check out that new Mexican place downtown if you guys wanna go."

Ashley shook her head. "I thought me and Pidge could go alone tonight."

"I'm going out with Parker."

"Again?" She said, annoyed.

"Again," I said in a sing-song voice.

The door bell rang, and I hurried past Ashley to open the door. Parker stood in front of me, his naturally wavy blonde hair sitting atop his cleanly shaven face.

"Do you ever look less than gorgeous?" Parker asked.

"Based on the first time she came over here, I'm going to say yes," Ashley said from behind me.

I rolled my eyes and smiled, holding up a finger to Parker to signal him to wait. I turned and threw my arms around Ashley. sHe stiffened with surprise and then relaxed, pulling me tight against her.

I looked into her eyes and smiled. "Thanks for organizing my birthday party. Can I take a rain check on dinner?"

A dozen emotions scrolled across Ashleys face, and then the corners of her mouth turned up. "Tomorrow?"

I squeezed her and grinned. "Absolutely." I waved to her as Parker grabbed my hand.

"What was that about?" Parker asked.

"We haven't been getting along lately. That was my version of an olive branch."

"Should I be worried?" he asked, opening my door.

"No," I smiled, kissing his cheek.

At dinner, Parker talked about Harvard, and the House, and his plans to search for an apartment. His eyebrows pulled in. "Will Ashley be escorting you to your birthday party?"

"I'm not really sure. SHe hasn't said anything about it."

"If she doesn't mind, I'd like to take you." He took my hand in his and kissed my fingers.

"I'll ask her. The party was her idea, so…."

"I understand. If not, I'll just see you there," he smiled.

Parker took me to the apartment, slowing to a stop in the parking lot. When he kissed me goodbye, his lips lingered on mine. He yanked up the parking brake as his lips traveled along the ridge of my jaw to my ear, and then half-way down my neck. It took me off-guard, and I let out a quiet sigh in response.

"You are so beautiful," he whispered. "I've been distracted all night, with your hair pulled away from your neck." He peppered my neck with kisses and I exhaled, a hum escaping with my breath.

"What took you so long?" I smiled, lifting my chin to give him better access.

Parker focused on my lips. He grabbed each side of my face, kissing me a bit firmer than usual. We didn't have much room in the car, but we made the space available work to our advantage. He leaned against me, and I bent my knee as I fell against the window. His tongue slipped inside my mouth, and his hand grabbed my ankle, and then slid up my leg to my thigh. The windows fogged within minutes with our labored breath, sticking to the cool windows. His lips grazed my collarbone, and then his head jerked up when the glass vibrated with several loud thumps.

Parker sat up, and I righted myself, adjusting my dress. I jumped when the door flew open. Ashley and Kyla stood beside the car. Kyla wore a sympathetic frown, and Ashley seemed just short of flying into a blind rage.

"What the hell , Ashley?" Parker yelled.

The situation suddenly felt dangerous. I'd never heard Parker raise his voice, Ashleys knuckles were white as she balled them into fists at her sides—and I was in the way. Kyla shaking her head at Parker in silent warning.

"C'mon, Spence. I need to talk to you," she said.

"About what?"

"Just come on!" she snapped.

I looked to Parker, seeing the irritation in his eyes. "I'm sorry, I have to go."

"No, it's fine. Go ahead."

Ashley helped me from the Porsche, and then kicked the door shut. I flipped around and stood between her and the car, shoving her shoulder. "What is wrong with you? Knock it off!"

Kyla seemed nervous. It didn't take long to figure out why. Ashley reeked of whiskey; she had insisted on accompanying her, or she'd asked her to come. Either way she was a deterrent to violence

The wheels of Parker's shiny Porsche squealed out of the parking lot, and Ashley lit a cigarette. "You can go in, now, Ky."

She tugged on my skirt. "C'mon, Spence."

"Why don't you stay, Spen ," she seethed.

I nodded for Kyla to go ahead and she reluctantly complied. I crossed my arms, ready for a fight, preparing myself to lash out at her after the inevitable lecture. Ashley took several drags from her cigarette, and when it was obvious that she wasn't going to explain, my patience ran out.

" Why did you do that?" I asked.

" Why ? Because he was mauling you in front of my apartment!" She yelled. Her eyes were unfocused, and I could see that she was incapable of rational conversation.

I kept my voice calm. "I may be staying with you, but what I do, and who I do it with is my business."

SHe flicked her cigarette to the ground. "You're so much better than that, Pidge. Don't let him fuck you in a car like a cheap prom date."

"I wasn't going to have sex with him!"

SHe gestured to the empty space where Parker's car sat. "What were you doing, then?"

"Haven't you ever made out with someone, Ashley? Haven't you just messed around without letting it get that far?"

SHe frowned and shook her head as if I was speaking gibberish. "What's the point in that?"

"The concept exists for a lot of people…especially those that date ."

"The windows were all fogged up, the car was bouncing…how was I supposed to know?" She said, waving her arms in the direction of the empty parking slot

"Maybe you shouldn't spy on me!"

SHe rubbed her face and shook her head. "I can't stand this, Pigeon. I feel like I'm going crazy."

I threw out my hands and let them hit my thighs. "You can't stand what ?"

"If you sleep with him, I don't wanna know about it. I'll go to prison for a long time if I find out he...just don't tell me."

"Ashley," I seethed. "I can't believe you just said that! That's a big step for me!"

"That's what all girls say!"

"I don't mean the sluts you deal with! I mean me !" I said, holding my hand to my chest. "I haven't… ugh! Never mind." I walked away from her, but she grabbed my arm, twirling me around to face her.

"You haven't what?" She asked, weaving a bit. I didn't answer—I didn't have to. I could see the recognition light up her face and she laughed once. "You're a virgin ?"

"So what?" I said, the blood under my cheeks igniting.

Her eyes drifted from mine, in and out of focus as she tried to think through the whisky. "That's why Kyla was so sure it wouldn't get too far."

"I had the same boyfriend all four years of high school. He was an aspiring Baptist youth minister! It never came up!"

Ashleys anger vanished, and relief was apparent in her eyes. "A youth minister? What happened after all that hard-earned abstinence?"

"He wanted to get married and stay in…Kansas. I didn't." I was desperate to change the subject. The amusement in Ashleys eyes was humiliating enough. I didn't want her digging further into my past.

SHe took a step toward me and held each side of my face. "A virgin," she said, shaking her head. "I would have never guessed with the way you danced at the Red."

"Very funny," I said, stomping up the stairs.

Ashley attempted to follow me, but tripped and fell, rolling onto her back and laughing hysterically.

"What are you doing? Get up!" I said, helping her to her feet.

SHe hooked her arm around my neck, and I helped her up the stairs. Aiden and Kyla were already in bed, so with no help in sight, I kicked off my heels to avoid breaking my ankles while walking Ashley to the bedroom. SHe fell on her back to the bed, pulling me with her.

When we landed, my face was just inches from hers. Her expression was suddenly serious. SHe leaned up, nearly kissing me, but I pushed her away. Ashleys eyebrows pulled in.

"Knock it off, Ash," I said.

SHe held me tight against her until I quit struggling, and then she flicked the strap of my dress, causing it to hang off my shoulder. "Since the word virgin came out of those beautiful lips of yours…I have a sudden urge to help you out of that dress."

"Well, that's too bad. You were ready to kill Parker for the same thing twenty minutes ago, so don't be a hypocrite."

"Fuck Parker. He doesn't know you like I do."

"Ash, c'mon. Let's get your clothes off and get you in bed."

"That's what I'm talkin' about," she chuckled.

"How much did you drink?" I asked, finally getting my footing between her legs.

"Enough," she smiled, pulling at the hem of my dress.

"You probably surpassed enough a gallon ago," I said, slapping her hand away. I planted my knee on the mattress beside her, and pulled her shirt over her head. SHe reached for me again and I grabbed her wrist, sniffing at the pungent stench in the air. "God, Ash, you reek of Jack Daniels."

"Jim Beam," she corrected with a drunken nod.

"It smells like burnt wood and chemicals."

"It tastes like it, too," she laughed. I pulled open her belt buckle and yanked it from the loops. SHe laughed with the jerking motion, and then lifted her head to look at me. "Better guard your virginity, Pidge. You know I like it rough."

"Shut up," I said, unbuttoning her jeans, slipping them down over her hips, and then off her legs. I threw the denim to the floor and stood with my hands on my hips, breathing hard. Her legs were hanging off the end of the bed, her eyes closed, and her breathing deep and heavy. SHe had passed out.

I took a deep breath and walked over the closet, shaking my head as I rifled through our clothes. I unzipped my dress and shoved it down over my hips, letting it fall to my ankles. Kicking it into the corner, I pulled my ponytail holder from my hair, shaking my hair out.

The closet was bursting with her clothes and mine, and I puffed, blowing my hair from my face as I searched through the mess for a t-shirt. As I pulled one off the hanger, Ashley slammed into my back, wrapping her arms around my waist.

"You scared the shit outta me!" I complained.

SHe ran her hands over my skin. I noticed they felt different; slow and deliberate. I closed my eyes when she pulled me against her and buried her face in my hair, nuzzling my neck. Feeling her bare skin against mine, it took me a moment to protest.

"Ash…,"

SHe pulled my hair to one side and grazed her lips along my back from one shoulder to the other, unsnapping the clasp of my bra. SHe kissed the bare skin at the base of my neck and I closed my eyes, the warm softness of her mouth felt too good to make her stop. A quiet moan escaped from her throat when she pressed her pelvis against mine, and I could feel how much she wanted me through her underwear, she was wet as was I. I held my breath, knowing the only thing keeping us from that big step I was so opposed to a few moments before was two thin pieces of fabric.

Ashley turned me to face her, and then pressed against me, leaning my back against the wall. Our eyes met, and I could see the ache in her expression as she scanned the bare pieces of my skin. I had seen her peruse women before, but this was different. SHe didn't want to

conquer me; she wanted me to say yes.

SHe leaned in to kiss me, stopping just an inch away. I could feel the heat from her skin radiating against my lips, and I had to stop myself from drawing her in the rest of the way. Her fingers were digging into my skin as she deliberated, and then her hands slid from my back to the hem of my panties. Her index fingers slid down my hips, in between my skin and the lacey fabric, and in the same moment that she was about to slip the delicate threads down my legs, she hesitated. Just when I opened my mouth to say yes, she clenched his eyes shut.

"Not like this," she whispered, brushing her lips across mine. "I want you, but not like this."

SHe stumbled backwards, falling against the bed to her back, and I stood for a moment with my arms crossed across my stomach. When her breathing evened out, I shoved my arms through the shirt I still had in my hand, and yanked it over my head. Ashley didn't move, and I

blew out a slow breath of air, knowing I couldn't restrain either of us if I crawled in bed and she woke up with a less honorable perspective.

I hurried to the recliner and collapsed into it, covering my face with my hands. I felt the layers of frustration dancing and crashing into each other inside of me. Parker had left feeling slighted, Ashley waited until I was seeing someone—someone I truly liked—to show an interest in me, and I seemed to be the only girl she couldn't bring himself to sleep with, even when she was wasted.

The next morning, I poured orange juice into a tall glass, and took a sip as I bobbed my head to the music playing from my IPod. I'd woken before the sun, and then squirmed in the recliner until eight. After that, I decided to clean up the kitchen to pass the time until my less ambitious roommates awoke. I loaded the dishwasher and swept and mopped, and then wiped the counters down. When the kitchen was sparkling, I grabbed the basket of clean clothes and sat on the couch, folding until there were a dozen or more piles surrounding me.

Murmuring came from Aidens room. Kyla giggled and then it was quiet for a few minutes more, followed by noises that made me feel a bit uncomfortable sitting alone in the living room.

I stacked the piles of folded clothes in the basket and carried it to Ashleys room, smiling when I saw that she hadn't moved from the way she had fallen the night before. I set the basket down and pulled the blanket over her, stifling a laugh when she turned over.

"View, Pigeon," she said, mumbling something inaudible before her breathing returned to slow and deep.

I couldn't help but watch her sleep; knowing she was dreaming about me sent a thrill through my veins that I couldn't explain. Ashley lay silent, so I to take a shower, hoping the sound of someone up and around would quiet aiden and Kylas moans and the creaking and banging of the bed against the wall. When I turned off the water, I realized they weren't

worried about who could hear.

I combed my hair, rolling my eyes at Kylas high-pitched yelps, more closely resembling a poodle than a porn star. The door bell rang, and I grabbed my blue terry-cloth robe and tightened the belt, jogging across the living room floor. The noises from Aidens bedroom immediately cut off, and I opened the door to Parker's smiling face.

"Good morning," he said.

I raked my wet hair back with my fingers. "What are you doing here?"

"I didn't like the way we said goodbye last night. I went out this morning to get your birthday present, and I couldn't wait to give it to you. So," he said, pulling a shiny box from his jacket pocket, "happy birthday, Spen."

He set the silver package in my hand, and I leaned in to kiss his cheek. "Thank you."

"Go ahead. I want to see your face when you open it."

I slipped my finger under the tape on the underside of the box, and then pulled the paper off, handing it to him. A rope of shimmering diamonds sat snuggly in a white gold bracelet.

"Parker," I whispered.

He beamed. "You like it?"

"I do," I said holding it in front of my face in awe, "but it's too much. I couldn't accept this if we'd been dating a year, much less a week."

Parker grimaced. "I thought you might say that. I searched high and low all morning for the perfect birthday present, and when I saw this, I knew there was only one place it could ever belong," he said, taking it from my fingers and clasping it around my wrist. "And I was right. It looks incredible on you."

I held up my wrist and shook my head, hypnotized by the brilliance of colors reacting to the sunlight. "It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. No one's ever given me anything so…," expensive came to mind, but I didn't want to say that, "elaborate. I don't know what to say."

Parker laughed, and then kissed my cheek. "Say that you'll wear it tomorrow."

I grinned from ear to ear. "I'll wear it tomorrow," I said, looking to my wrist.

"I'm glad you like it. The look on your face was worth the seven stores I went to."

I sighed. "You went to seven stores?" He nodded, and I took his face in my hands. "Thank you. It's perfect," I said, kissing him quickly.

He hugged me tight. "I have to get back. I'm having lunch with my parents, but I'll call you later, okay?"

"Okay. Thank you!" I called after him, watching him trot down the stairs.

I hurried into the apartment, unable to take my eyes off of my wrist.

"Holy shit, Spence!" Kyla said, grabbing my hand. "Where did you get this?"

"Parker brought it. It's my birthday present," I said.

Kyla gawked at me, and then down at the bracelet. "He bought you a diamond tennis bracelet? After a week? If I didn't know better, I'd say you have a magic crotch!"

I laughed out loud, beginning a ridiculous giggle-fest in the living room.

Aiden emerged from his bedroom, looking tired and satisfied. "What are you fruitcakes shrieking about in here?"

Kyla held up my wrist. "Look! Her birthday present from Parker!"

Aiden squinted, and then his eyes popped open. "Whoa."

"I know, right?" Kyla said, nodding.

Ashley stumbled around the corner, looking a bit beat up. "You guys are loud as fuck," she groaned, buttoning her jeans.

"Sorry," I said, pulling my hand from Kylas grip. Our almost-moment crept into my mind, and I couldn't seem to look her in the eyes.

SHe downed the rest of my orange juice, and then wiped her mouth. "Who in the hell let me drink that much last night?"Kyla sneered, "You did. You went out and bought a fifth after Spence left with Parker, and killed the whole thing by the time she got back."

"Damn," she said, shaking her head. "Did you have fun?" She asked, looking to me.

"Are you serious ?" I asked, showing my anger before thinking.

"What?"

Kyla laughed. "You pulled her out of Parker's car, seeing red when you caught them making out like high-schoolers. They fogged up the windows and everything!"

Ashleys eyes unfocused, scanning her memories of the night before. I worked to stifle my temper. If she didn't remember pulling me from the car, she wouldn't remember how close I came to handing my virginity to her on a silver platter.

"How pissed are you?" She asked, wincing.

"Pretty pissed." I was angrier that my feelings had nothing to do with Parker. I tightened my robe and stomped down the hall. Ashley's' footsteps were right behind me.

"Pidge," she said, catching the door when I shut it in her face. SHe slowly pushed it open and stood before me, waiting to suffer my wrath.

"Do you remember anything you said to me last night?" I asked.

"No. Why? Was I mean to you?" Her bloodshot eyes were heavy with worry, which only served to amplify my anger.

"No you weren't mean to me! You…we…." I covered my eyes with my hands, and then froze when I felt Ashley's' hand on my wrist.

"Where'd this come from?" She said, glaring at the bracelet.

"It's mine," I said, pulling away from her.

SHe didn't take her eyes from my wrist. "I've never seen it before. It looks new."

"It is."

"Where'd you get it?"

"Parker gave it to me about fifteen minutes ago," I said, watching her face morph from confusion to rage.

"What the fuck was that douchebag doing here ? Did he stay the night?" She asked, her voice rising with each question.

I crossed my arms. "He went shopping for my birthday present this morning and brought it by."

"It's not your birthday, yet." Her face turned a deep shade of red as she worked to keep her temper under control.

"He couldn't wait," I said, lifting my chin with stubborn pride

"No wonder I had to drag your ass out of his car, sounds like you were…." She trailed off, pressing her lips together.

I narrowed my eyes. "What? Sounds like I was what ?"

Her jaw tensed and she took a deep breath, blowing it out from her nose. "Nothing. I'm just pissed off, and I was going to say something shitty that I didn't mean."

"It's never stopped you before."

"I know. I'm working on it," she said, walking to the door. "I'll let you get dressed."

When she reached for the knob, she paused, rubbing her arm. As soon as her fingers touched the tender splatter of purple pooling under her skin, she pulled up her elbow and noticed the bruise. SHe stared at it for a moment, and then turned to me.

"I fell on the stairs last night. And you helped me to bed…." She said, sifting through the blurry images in her mind.

My heart was pounding, and I swallowed hard as I watched realization strike. Her eyes narrowed. "We," she began, taking a step toward me, looking at the closet, and then to the bed.

"No we didn't. Nothing happened," I said, shaking my head.

SHe cringed, the memory obviously replaying in her mind. "You fog up Parker's windows, I pull you out of the car, and then I try to…," she said, shaking her head. SHe turned for the door and grabbed the knob, her knuckles white. "You're turning me into a fucking psycho, Pigeon," she growled over her shoulder. "I don't think straight when I'm around you."

"So it's my fault?"

SHe turned. Her eyes fell from my face to my robe, to my legs, and then my feet, returning to my eyes. "I don't know. My memory is a little hazy…but I don't recall you saying no."

I took a step forward, ready to argue that irrelevant little fact, but I couldn't. SHe was right. "What do you want me to say, Ashley?" sHe looked at the bracelet, and then back at me with accusing eyes. "You were hoping I wouldn't remember?"

"No! I was pissed that you forgot!"

Her brown eyes bored into mine. " Why ?"

"Because if I would have…if we would have…and you didn't…I don't know why! I just was!"

SHe stormed across the room, stopping inches from me. Her hands touched each side of my face, her breathing quick as she scanned my face. "What are we doin', Pidge?"

My eyes began at her belt, and then rose over the muscles and tattoos to her stomach and chest, finally settling on the warm brown of her irises. "You tell me."


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own neither SON/beautiful disaster

"Spence?" Aiden said, knocking on the door. "Kyla was going to run some errands, she wanted me to let you know in case you needed to go."

Ashley hadn't taken her eyes from mine. "Pidge?"

"Yeah," I called to Aiden. "I have some stuff I need to take care of."

"All right, she's ready to go when you are," Aiden said, his footsteps disappearing down the hall.

"Pidge?"

I pulled a few things from the closet and slid past her. "Can we talk about this later? I have a lot to do today."

"Sure," she said with a contrived smile.

It was a relief when I reached the bathroom, hurriedly closing the door behind me. I had two weeks left in the apartment, and there was no way to put off the conversation for that long. The logical part of my brain insisted that Parker was my type: attractive, smart and interested in me. Why I bothered with Ashley was something I would never understand.

Whatever the reason, it was making us both insane. I had been divided into two separate people; the docile, polite person I was with Parker, and the angry, confused, frustrated person I turned into around Ashley. The entire school had witnessed Ashley going from unpredictable before, to damn near volatile.

I dressed quickly, leaving Ashley and Aiden to go downtown with Kyla. She giggled about her morning sexcapade with AIden, and I listened with dutiful nods in all the right places. It was hard to focus on the topic at hand with the diamonds of my bracelet creating tiny dots of light on the ceiling of the car, reminding me of the choice I was suddenly faced with. Ashley wanted an answer, and I didn't have one.

"Okay, Spence. What's going on? You've been quiet."

"This thing with Ash…it's just a mess."

"Why?" she said, her sunglasses pushing up when she wrinkled her nose.

"She asked me what we were doing."

"What are you doing? Are you with Parker or what?"

"I like him but it's been a week. We're not serious or anything."

"You have feelings for Ashley, don't you?"

I shook my head. "I don't know how I feel about her.I just don't see it happening, Mare. She's too much of a bad thing."

"Neither one of you will just come out and say it, that's the problem. You're both so scared of what might happen that you're fighting it tooth and nail. I know for a fact that if you looked Ashley in the eye and told her you wanted her. she would never look at another woman again."

"You know that for a fact?"

"Yes. I have the inside track, remember?"

I paused in thought for a moment. Ashley had been talking to Aiden about me, but Aiden wouldn't encourage a relationship by telling Kyla. He knew she would tell me, leading me to the only conclusion: Kyla had overheard them. I wanted to ask her what was said, but thought better of it.

"That situation is a broken

heart just waiting to happen," I said, shaking my head. "I don't think she's capable of being faithful."

"she wasn't capable of carrying on a friendship with a female, either, but you two sure shocked the whole of Eastern."

I fingered my bracelet and sighed. "I don't know. I don't mind how things are. We can just be friends."

Kyla shook her head. "Except that you're not just friends," she sighed. "You know what? I'm over this conversation. Let's go get our hair and makeup done. I'll buy you a new outfit for your birthday."

"I think that's exactly what I need," I smiled.

After hours of manicures, pedicures, being brushed, waxed and powdered, I stepped into my shiny, yellow high heels and tugged on my new, grey dress.

"Now that's the Spencer I know and love!" she laughed, shaking her head at my ensemble. "You have to wear that to your party tomorrow."

"Wasn't that the plan all along?" I said, smirking. My cell phone buzzed in my purse, and I held it to my ear. "Hello?"

"It's dinner time! Where the hell did you two run off to?" Ashley said.

"We indulged in a little pampering. You and Aid knew how to eat before we came along. I'm sure you can manage."

"Well, no shit. We worry about you, ya know."

I looked at Kyla and smiled. "We're fine."

"Tell her I'll have you back in no time. I have to stop by Brazil's to pick up some notes for Aiden, and then we'll be home."

"Did you get that?" I asked.

"Yeah. See you then, Pidge."

We drove to Brazil's in silence. Kyla turned off the ignition, staring at the apartment building ahead. Aiden asking Kyla to drive over surprised me; we were just a block from Aiden and Ashleys apartment, .

"What's wrong, Ky?"

"Brazil just gives me the creeps. The last time I was here with Aid, he was being all flirty."

"Well, I'll go in with you. If he so much as winks at you, I'll stab him in the eye with my new heels, okay?"

Kyla smiled and hugged me. "Thanks, Spence!"

We walked to the back of the building, and Kyla took a deep breath before knocking on the door. We waited, but no one came.

"I guess she's not here?" I asked.

"She's here," she said, irritated. She banged on the wood with the side of her fist and then the door swung open.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" the crowd inside yelled.

The ceiling was pink and black bubbles, every inch covered by helium balloons, with long, silver strings hanging down in the faces of the guests. The crowd separated, and Ashley walked approached me with a broad smile, touching each side of my face and kissing my forehead.

"Happy birthday, Pigeon."

"It's not 'til tomorrow," I said. Still in shock, I tried smiling at everyone around us.

Ashley shrugged. "Well, since you were tipped off, we had to make some last minute

changes to surprise you. Surprised?"

"Very!" I said as Carmen hugged me.

"Happy birthday, Baby!" Carmen said, kissing my cheek.

Kyla nudged me with her elbow. "Good thing I got you to go run errands with me today or you would have shown up looking like ass!"

"You look great," Ashley said, scanning my dress.

Brazil hugged me, pressing his cheek to mine. "And I hope you know Kyla's Brazil is Creepy story was just a line to get you in here."

I looked at Kyla and she laughed. "It worked, didn't it?"

Once everyone took turns hugging me and wishing me a happy birthday, I leaned into Kyla's ear. "Where's Parker?"

"He'll be here later," she whispered. "Aiden couldn't get him on the phone to let him know until this afternoon."

Brazil cranked up the volume on the stereo, and everyone screamed. "Come here, Spence!" he said, walking to the kitchen. He lined up shot glasses along the counter and pulled a bottle of tequila from the bar. "Happy birthday from the football team, baby girl," he smiled, pouring each shot glass full of Patron. "This is the way we do birthdays: You turn nineteen, you have nineteen shots. You can drink 'em or give 'em away, but the more you drink, the more of these you get," he said, fanning out a handful of twenties.

"Oh my God!" I squealed.

"Drink 'em up, Pidge!" Ashley said.

I looked to Brazil, suspicious. "I get a twenty for every shot I drink?"

"That's right, lightweight. Gauging by the size of you, I'm going to say we'll get away with losing sixty bucks by the end of the night."

"Think again, Brazil," I said, grabbing the first shot glass, rolling it across my lip, tipping my head back to empty the glass and then rolling it the rest of the way, dropping it into my other hand.

"Holy shit!" Ashley exclaimed.

"This is really a waste, Brazil." I said, wiping the corners of my mouth. "You shoot Cuervo, not Patron."

The smug smile on Brazil's face faded, and he shook his head and shrugged. "Get after it, then. I've got the wallets of twelve football players that say you can't finish ten."

I narrowed my eyes. "Double or nothing says I can drink fifteen."

"Whoa!" Aiden cried. "You're not allowed to hospitalize yourself on your birthday, Spence!"

"She can do it," Kyla said, staring at Brazil.

"Forty bucks a shot?" Brazil said, looking unsure.

"Are you scared?" I asked.

"Hell no! I'll give you twenty a shot, and when you make it to fifteen, I'll double your total."

"That's how Ohioans do birthdays," I said, popping back another shot.

An hour and three shots later, I was in the living room dancing with Ashley. The song was a rock ballad, and Ashley mouthed the words to me as we danced. She dipped me at the end of the first chorus, and I let my arms fall behind me. Shr popped me back up, and I sighed.

"You can't do that when I start getting into the double digit shots," I giggled.

"Did I tell you how incredible you look tonight?"

I shook my head and hugged her, laying my head on her shoulder. She tightened her grip, and buried her face in my neck, making me forget about decisions or bracelets or my separate personalities; I was exactly where I wanted to be.

When the music changed to a faster beat, the door opened.

"Parker!" I said, running over to hug him. "You made it!"

"Sorry I'm late, Spen," he said, pressing his lips against mine."Happy birthday."

"Thanks," I said, seeing Ashley stare at us from the corner of my eye.

Parker lifted my wrist. "You wore it."

"I said I would. Wanna dance?"

He shook his head. "Uh…I don't dance."

"Oh. Well, you wanna witness my sixth shot of Petron?" I smiled, holding up my five twenties. "I make double if I get to fifteen."

"That's a bit dangerous, isn't it?"

I leaned into his ear. "I am totally hustling them. I've played this game with my dad since I was sixteen."

"Oh," he said, frowning with disapproval. "You drank Tequila with your dad?"

I shrugged. "It was his way of bonding."

Parker seemed unimpressed as his eyes left mine, scanning the crowd. "I can't stay long. I'm leaving early for a hunting trip with my father."

"It's a good thing my party was tonight, or you wouldn't have made it tomorrow," I said, surprised to hear of his plans.

He smiled and took my hand. "I would have made it back in time."

I pulled him to the counter, picked up another shot glass and killed it, slamming it on the counter upside down like I had the previous five. Brazil handed me another twenty, and I danced into the living room. Ashley grabbed me, and we danced with Kyla and Aiden.

Aiden slapped me on the butt. "One!"

Kyla added a second swat on my backside, and then the entire party joined in, except Parker.

At number nineteen, Ashley rubbed her hands together. "My turn!"

I rubbed my sore posterior. "Be easy! My ass hurts!"

With an evil smirk, she reared her hand far above her shoulder. I closed my eyes tight. After a few moments, I peeked back. Just before her hand made contact, she stopped and gave me a gentle pat.

"Nineteen!" She exclaimed.

The guests cheered, and Kyla started a drunken rendition ofHappy Birthday . I laughed when the part came to say my name and the entire room sang "Pigeon".

Another slow song came over the stereo, and Parker pulled me to the make-shift dance floor. It didn't take me long to figure out why he didn't dance.

"Sorry," he said after stepping on my toes for the third time.

I leaned my head on his shoulder. "You're doing just fine," I lied.

He pressed his lips against my temple. "What are you doing Monday night?"

"Going to dinner with you?"

"Yes. In my new apartment."

"You found one!"

He laughed and nodded. "We'll order in, though. My cooking isn't exactly edible."

I'd eat it, anyway," I smiled up at him.

Parker glanced around the room and then led me to a hallway. He gently pressed me against the wall, kissing me with his soft lips. His hands were everywhere. At first I played along, but after his tongue infiltrated my lips, I got the distinct feeling that I was doing something wrong.

"Okay, Parker," I said, maneuvering away.

"Everything all right?"

"I just think it's rude of me to make out with you in a dark corner when I have guests out there."

He smiled and kissed me again. "You're right, I'm sorry. I just wanted to give you a memorable birthday kiss before I left."

"You're leaving?"

He touched my cheek. "I have to wake up in four hours, Spen."

I pressed my lips together. "Okay. I'll see you Monday?"

"You'll see me tomorrow. I'll stop by when I get back."

He led me to the door and then kissed my cheek before he left. I noticed that Aiden, Kyla and Ashley were all staring at me.

"Daddy's gone!" Ashley yelled when the door closed. "Time to get the party started!"

Everyone cheered, and Ashley pulled me to the center of the floor.

"Hang on…I'm on a schedule," I said, leading her by the hand to the counter. I knocked back another shot, and laughed when Ashley took one from the end, sucking it down. I grabbed another, and swallowed, and she did the same.

"Seven more, Spence," Brazil said, handing me two more twenty dollar bills.

I wiped my mouth as Ashley pulled me to the living room again. I danced with Kyla, and then Aiden, but when Chris Jenks from the football team tried to dance with me, Ashley pulled him back by the shirt and shook his head. Chris shrugged and turned, dancing with the first girl he saw.

The tenth shot hit hard, and I felt a little dizzy standing on Brazil's couch with Kyla, dancing like clumsy grade-schoolers. We giggled over nothing, waving our arms around to the beat.

I stumbled, nearly falling off the couch backward, but Ashley's hands were instantly on my hips to steady me.

"You've made your point," she said. "You've drank more than any girl we've ever seen. I'm cutting you off."

"The hell you are," I slurred. "I have six hundred bucks waiting on me at the bottom of that shot glass, and you of all people aren't going to tell me I can't do something extreme for cash."

"If you're that hard up for money, Pidge…."

"I'm not borrowing money from you," I sneered.

"I was gonna suggest pawning that bracelet," she smiled.

I smacked her on the arm just as Kyla started the countdown to midnight. When the hands of the clock superimposed on the twelve, we all celebrated.

I was nineteen.

Kyla and Auden kissed each side of my cheek, and Ashley lifted me off the ground, twirling me around.

"Happy birthday, Pigeon," she said with a soft expression.

I stared into her warm, brown eyes for a moment, feeling lost inside of them. The room was frozen in time as we stared at each other, so close I could feel her breath on my skin.

"Shots!" I said, stumbling to the counter.

"You look torn up, Spence. I think it's time to call it a night," Brazil said.

"I'm not a quitter," I said. "I wanna see my money."

Brazil placed a twenty under the last two glasses, and then he yelled at his teammates, "She's gonna drink 'em! I need fifteen!"

They all groaned and rolled their eyes, pulling out their wallets to form a stack of twenties behind the last shot glass. Ashley had emptied the other four shots on the other side of my fifteen.

"I would have never believed that I could lose fifty bucks on a fifteen shot bet with a girl," Chris complained.

"Believe it, Jenks" I said, picking up a glass in each hand.

I knocked back each of the glasses and waited for the vomit rising in my throat to settle.

"Pigeon?" Ashley asked, taking a step in my direction.

I raised a finger and Brazil smiled. "She's going to lose it," he said.

"No she won't," Kyla shook her head. "Deep breath, Spencer."

I closed my eyes and inhaled, picking up the last shot.

"Holy God, Carlin! You're going to die of alcohol poisoning!"Aiden cried.

"She's got this," Kyla assured him.

I tipped my head and let the tequila flow down my throat. My teeth and lips had been numb since shot number eight, and the kick of the eighty proof had long since lost its edge. The entire party erupted into whistles and yells as Brazil handed me the stack of money.

"Thank you," I said with pride, tucking the money away in my bra.

"You are incredibly sexy right now," Travis said in my ear as we walked to the living room.

We danced into the morning, and the tequila running through my veins eased me into oblivion

"You are incredibly sexy right now," Ashley said in my ear as we walked to the living room.

We danced into the morning, and the tequila running through my veins eased me into oblivion


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own neither SON/Beautiful disaster

When my eyes finally peeled open, I saw that my pillow consisted of denim and legs. Ashley sat with her head against the tub; her head leaned against the wall. Passed out cold. She looked as rough as I felt. I pulled the blanket off of me and stood up, gasping at my horrifying reflection on the mirror above the sink.

I looked like death.

Mascara smeared, black tear stains down my cheek, lipstick smudged across my mouth and my hair had balls of rats on each side.

Sheets, towels and blankets surrounded Ashley. She had fashioned a soft pallet to sleep on while I expelled the fifteen shots of tequila I'd consumed the night before. Ashley had held my hair out of the toilet, and sat with me all night.

I turned on the faucet, holding my hand under the water until it was the temperature I wanted. Scrubbing the mess from my face, I heard a moan from the floor. Ashley stirred, rubbed her eyes and stretched, and then looked beside her, jerking in a panic.

"I'm right here," I said. "Why don't you go to bed? Get some sleep?"

"You okay?" She said, wiping her eyes once more.

"Yeah, I'm good. Well, good as I can be. I'll feel better once I get a shower." she stood up. "You took my crazy title last night, just so you know. I don't know where that came from, but I don't want you to do it again."

"It's pretty much what I grew up around, Ash. Not a big deal."

She took my chin in her hands and wiped the remaining smeared mascara from under my eyes with her thumbs. "It was a big deal to me."

"Fine, I won't do it again. Happy?"

"Yes. But, I have something to tell you, if you promise not to freak out."

"Oh, God, what did I do?"

"Nothing, but you need to call Kyla."

"Where is she?"

"At Morgan. She got into it with Aiden last night."

I rushed through my shower and yanked on the clothes Ashley had set on the sink. When I emerged from the bathroom, Aiden and Ashley were sitting in the living room.

"What did you do to her?" I demanded.

Aiden's face fell. "She's really pissed at me."

"What happened?"

"I was mad that she encouraged you to drink so much. I thought we were going to end up taking you to the hospital. One thing led to another and the next thing I know, we're screaming at each other. We were both drunk, Spence. I said some things I can't take back," he shook his head, looking to the floor.

"Like what?" I said, angry.

"I called her a few names I'm not proud of and then told her to leave."

"You let her leave here drunk? Are you some kind of idiot?" I said, grabbing at my purse.

"Easy, Pidge. He feels bad enough," Ashley said.

I fished my cell out of my purse, dialing Kyla's number

"Hello?" She answered. She sounded awful.

"I just heard" I sighed "are you okay?" I walked down the hall for privacy, glancing back once to shoot a dirty look at Aiden.

"I'm fine. He's an asshole" her words were abrupt, but I could hear the hurt in her voice. Kyla had mastered the art of hiding emotions and she could have hidden it from anyone but me.

"I'm sorry I didn't go with you"

"You were out if it, Spence" she said dismissively

"Why don't you get me? We can talk about it."

She breathed into the phone. "I don't know. I don't really feel like seeing him"

"I'll tell him to stay inside, then."

There was a long pause, and then I heard her keys clink in the background. "All right. I'll be there in a minute."

I walked into the living room, pulling my purse over my shoulder. They watched me open the door to wait for Kyla and Aiden scooted forward on the couch.

"She's coming here?"

"She doesn't want to see you, Aid. I told her you'd stay inside."

He sighed, and fell against the cushion. "She hates me."

"I'll talk to her. You better get one amazing apology together, though."

Ten minutes later, a car horn beeped twice outside, and I closed the door behind me. When I reached the bottom of the stairs, Aiden rushed past me to Kyla's red Honda, and hunched over to see her through the window. I stopped in my tracks, watching Kyla snub him as she looked straight ahead. She rolled down her window, and Aiden seemed to be explaining, and then they began to argue. I went inside to give them their privacy.

"Pigeon?" Ashley said, trotting down the stairs.

"It doesn't look good."

"Let them figure it out. Come inside," she said, intertwining her fingers in mine to lead me up the stairs.

"Was it that bad?" I asked.

She nodded. "It was pretty bad. They're just getting out of the honeymoon stage, though. They'll work it out."

"For someone that's never had a girlfriend, you seem to know about relationships."

"I have four brothers and a lot of friends," she said, grinning to herself

Aiden stomped into the apartment and slammed the door behind him. "She's fucking impossible!"

I kissed Ashley on the cheek. "That's my cue."

"Good luck," Ashley smiled.

I slid in beside Kyla, and she huffed. "He's fucking impossible!"

I giggled, but she shot a glare in my direction. "Sorry," I said, forcing my smile to fade.

We set out for a drive and Kyla yelled, and cried, and yelled some more. At times she broke into rants that seemed to be directed at Aiden, as if he were sitting in my place. I sat quietly, letting her work it out in a way only Kyla can.

"He called me irresponsible! Me! As if I don't know you! As if I haven't seen you rob your dad of hundreds of dollars drinking twice as much. He doesn't know what the hell he's talking about! He doesn't know what your life was like! He doesn't know what I know, and he acts like I'm his child instead of his girlfriend!" I rested my hand on hers, but she pulled it away. "He thought you would be the reason we wouldn't work out, and then he ended up doing the job on his own. And speaking of you, what the hell was that last night with Parker?"

The sudden change of topic took me by surprise. "What do you mean?"

"Ashley threw you that party, Spence, and you go off and make out with Parker. And you wonder why everyone is talking about you!"

"Hold on a minute! I told Parker we shouldn't be back there. What does it matter if Ashley threw me that party or not? I'm not with her!"

Kyla looked straight ahead, blowing a puff of air from her nose.

"All right, Spence. What is it? You're mad at me, now?"

"I'm not mad at you. I just don't associate with complete idiots."

I shook my head, and then looked out the window before I said something I couldn't take back... Kyla had always been able to make me feel like shit on command.

"Do you even see what's going on?" she asked. "Ashley quit fighting. She doesn't go out without you. She hasn't brought any girls home since the bimbo twins…has yet to murder Parker, and you're worried about what people are saying. You know why that is, Spence? Because it's the truth!"

I turned, slowly craning my neck in her direction, trying to give her the dirtiest look I knew how. "What the hell is wrong with you?

"You're dating Parker, now, and you're so happy," she said in a mocking tone. "Then why aren't you at Morgan?"

"Because I lost the bet, you know that!"

"Give me a break, Spencer! You talk about how perfect Parker is, you go on these amazing dates with him, talk to him for hours on the phone, and then you lay next to Ashley every night. Do you see what's wrong with this situation? If you really liked Parker, your stuff would be at Morgan right now."

I clenched my teeth. "You know I've never welted on a bet, Ky."

"That's what I thought," she said, twisting her hands around the steering wheel. "Ashley is what you want, and Parker is what you think you need."

"I know it looks that way, but—,"

"It looks that way to everyone. So if you don't like the way people are talking about you—change. It's not Ashley's fault. She's done a one-eighty for you. You're reaping the rewards, and Parker's getting the benefits."

"A week ago you wanted to pack me up and never let Ashley come near me again! Now you're defending her?"

"Carlin! I'm not defending her, Stupid! I'm looking out for you! You're both crazy about each other! Do something about it!"

"How could you possibly think I should be with her?" I wailed. "You are supposed to be keeping me away from people like her!"

She pressed her lips together, clearly losing her patience. "You have worked so hard to separate yourself from your father. That's the only reason you're even considering Parker! He's the complete opposite of Arthur, and you think Ashley is going to land you right back where you were. She's not like your dad, Spence."

"I didn't say she was, but it's putting me in a prime position to follow in his footsteps."

"Ashley wouldn't do that to you. I think you underestimate just how much you mean to her. If you'd just tell her—,"

"No. We didn't leave everything behind to have everyone here look at me the way they did in Wichita. Let's focus on the problem at hand. Aid is waiting for you."

"I don't want to talk about Aid," she said, slowing to a stop at the light.

"He's miserable, Ky. He loves you."

Her eyes filled with tears and her bottom lip quivered. "I don't care."

"Yes you do."

"I know," she whimpered, leaning against my shoulder.

She cried until the light changed, and then I kissed her head. "Green light."

She sat up, wiping her nose. "I was pretty mean to him earlier. I don't think he'll talk to me now."

"He'll talk to you. He knew you were mad."

Kyla wiped her face, and then made a slow u-turn. I was worried it would take a lot of coaxing on my part to get her to come in with me, but Aiden ran down the stairs before she turned off the ignition.

He yanked open her car door, pulling her to her feet. "I'm so sorry, Baby. I should have minded my own business, I…please don't leave. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Kyla took his face in her hands and smiled. "You're an arrogant ass, but I still love you."

Aiden kissed her over and over like he hadn't seen her in months, and I smiled at a job well done. Ashley stood in the doorway, grinning as I made my way into the apartment.

"And they lived happily ever after," Ashley said, shutting the door behind me.

I collapsed on the couch, and she sat next to me, pulling my legs onto her lap.

"What do you wanna do today, Pidge?"

"Sleep. Or rest…or sleep."

"Can I give you your present, first?"

I pushed her shoulder. "Shut up. You got me a present?"

Her mouth curved into a nervous smile. "It's not a diamond bracelet, but I thought you'd like it."

"I'll love it, sight unseen."

She lifted my legs off of her lap, and then disappeared into Aiden's bedroom. I raised an eyebrow when I heard her murmuring, and then she emerged with a box. She sat it on the floor at my feet, crouching behind it.

"Hurry, I want you to be surprised," she smiled.

"Hurry?" I asked, lifting the lid.

My mouth fell open when a pair of big, dark brown eyes looked up at me.

"A puppy?" I shrieked, reaching into the box. I lifted the dark, wiry-haired baby to my face, and it covered my mouth in warm, wet kisses Ashley beamed, triumphant. "You like him?"

"Him? I love him! You got me a puppy!"

"It's a Cairn Terrier. I had to drive three hours to pick him up Thursday after class."

"So when you said you were going with Aiden to take his car to the shop…."

"We went to get your present," she nodded.

"He's wiggly!" I laughed.

"Every girl from Ohio needs a Toto," Ashley said, helping me hang on to the tiny fuzz ball in my lap.

"He does look like Toto! That's what I'm going to call him," I said, wrinkling my nose at the squirmy pup.

"You can keep him here. I'll take care of him for you when you're back at Morgan," her mouth pulled up into a half-smile, "and it's my security that you'll visit when your month is up."

I pressed my lips together. "I would have come back, anyway, Ash."

"I'd do anything for that smile that's on your face right now."

"I think you need a nap, Toto. Yes, you do," I cooed to the puppy.

Ashley nodded, pulled me onto her lap, and then stood up. "Come on, then."

She carried me into her bedroom, pulled back the covers, and then lowered me to the mattress. Crawling over me, she reached over to pull the curtains closed, and then fell onto her pillow.

"Thanks for staying with me last night," I said, stroking Toto's soft fur. "You didn't have to sleep on the bathroom floor."

"Last night was one of the best nights of my life."

I turned to see her expression. When I saw that she was serious, I shot her a dubious look. "Sleeping in between the toilet and the tub on a cold, hard tile floor with a vomiting idiot was one of your best nights? That's sad, Ash."

"No, sitting up with you when you're sick, and you falling asleep in my lap was one of my best nights. It wasn't comfortable, I didn't sleep worth a shit, but I brought in your nineteenth birthday with you, and you're actually pretty sweet when you're drunk."

"I'm sure between the heaving and purging I was very charming."

She pulled me close, patting Toto who was snuggled up to my neck. "You're the only woman I know that still looks incredible with your head in the toilet. That's saying something."

"Thanks, Ash. I won't make you babysit me again."

She leaned against her pillow. "Whatever. No one can hold your hair back like I can."

I giggled and closed my eyes, letting myself sink into the darkness.

"Get up, Spence!" Kyla yelled, shaking me. Toto licked my cheek. "I'm up! I'm up!"

"We have class in half an hour!"

I jumped from the bed. "I've been asleep for…fourteen hours? What the hell?"

"Just get in the shower! If you're not ready in ten minutes, I'm leaving your ass here!"

"I don't have time to take a shower!" I said, changing out of the clothes I fell asleep in.

Ashley propped her head on her hand and chuckled. "You girls are ridiculous. It's not the end of the world if you're late for one class."

"It is if you're Kyla. She doesn't miss and she hates being late," I said, pulling a shirt over my head, and stepping into my jeans.

"Let Kyla go ahead. I'll take you."

I hopped on one foot, and then the other, pulling my boots on. "My bag is in her car, Ash."

"Whatever," she shrugged, "just don't hurt yourself getting to class." She lifted Toto, cradling him with one arm like a tiny football, taking him down the hall.

Kyla rushed me out the door and into the car. "I can't believe she got you that puppy," she said, looking behind her as she backed out from the parking spot.

Ashley stood in the morning sun, in her shorts and sports bra and bare feet, clutching her arms around her from the cold. She watched Toto sniff a small patch of grass, coaxing him like a proud mother .

"I've never had a dog before," I said. "This should be interesting."

Kyla glanced at Ashley before shoving the Honda into gear. "Look at her," she said, shaking her head. "Ashley Davies: Ms. Mom."

"Toto is adorable. Even you will be putty in his paws."

"You can't take it back to the dorm with you, you know. I don't think Ashley thought this out."

"Ashley said she'd keep him at the apartment."

She raised one eyebrow. "Of course she will. Ashley thinks ahead, I'll give her that," she said, shaking her head as she slammed on the gas.

I puffed, sliding into my seat with one minute to spare. Once the adrenaline absorbed into my system, the heaviness from my post-birthday coma settled over my body. Kyla elbowed me when class was dismissed, and I followed her to the cafeteria.

Aiden met us at the door, and I noticed right away that something was wrong.

"Ky" Aiden said, grabbing her arm.

Ashley jogged to where we stood, and grabbed her hips, puffing until he caught her breath

"Is there a mob of angry women chasing you?" I teased.

He shook his head. "I was trying to catch you…before you…went in," he breathed.

"What's going on?" Kyla asked Aiden.

"There's a rumor," Aiden began. "Everyone's saying that Ashley took Spence home and…the details are different, but it's pretty bad."

" What ? Are you serious?" I cried.

Kyla rolled her eyes. "Who cares, Spence? People have been speculating about you and Ash for weeks. It's not the first time someone has accused you two of sleeping together."

Ashley and Aiden traded glances.

"What?" I said. "There's something else, isn't there?"

Aiden winced. "They're saying you slept with Parker at Brazil's, and then you let Ashley...take you home, if you know what I mean."

My mouth fell open. "Great! So I'm the school slut now?"

Ashley's' eyes darkened and her jaws tensed. "This is my fault. If it was anyone else, they wouldn't be saying that

about you." She walked into the cafeteria, her hands in fists at her sides.

Kyla and Aiden followed behind her. "Let's just hope no one is stupid enough to say anything to her," Kyla said.

"Or her," Aiden added.

Ashley sat a few seats across and down from me, brooding over her Reuben. I waited for her to look at me, wanting to offer a comforting smile. Ashley had a reputation, but I let Parker take me into the hall. Aiden elbowed me while I stared at his cousin. "She just feels bad. She's probably trying to deflect the rumor."

"You don't have to sit down there, Ash. Come on, come sit," I said, patting the empty surface in front of me.

"I heard you had quite a birthday, Spence," Chris Jenks said, throwing a piece of lettuce on Ashley's plate.

"Don't start with her, Jenks," Ashley warned, glowering.

Chris smiled, pushing up his round, pink cheeks. "I heard Parker is furious. He said he came by your apartment yesterday, and you and Ashley were still in bed."

"They were taking a nap, Chris," Kyla sneered.

My eyes darted to Ashley. "Parker came by?"

She shifted uncomfortably in her chair. "I was gonna tell you."

"When ?" I snapped.

Kyla leaned into my ear. "Parker heard the rumor, and came by to confront you. I tried to stop him, but he walked down the hall and…totally got the wrong idea."

I planted my elbows on the table, covering my face with my hands. "This just keeps getting better."

"So you guys really didn't do the deed?" Chris asked. "Damn, that sucks. Here I thought Spencer was right for you after all, Ash."

"You better stop, now, Chris," Aiden warned.

"If you didn't sleep with her, mind if I take a shot?" Chris said, chuckling to his teammates.

My face burned with the initial embarrassment, but then Kyla screamed in my ear, reacting to Ashley jumping from her seat. She reached over the table, grabbed Chris by the throat with one hand, and a fist full of t-shirt in the other. The linebacker slid across the table, and dozens of chairs grated across the floor as people stood to watch. Ashley punching him repeatedly in the face, her elbow spiking high in the air before she landed each blow. The only thing Chris could do was to cover his face with his hands.

No one touched Ashley. She was out of control, and her reputation left every one afraid to get in her way. The football players ducked and winced as they watched their teammate being assaulted without mercy on the tile floor.

"Ashley!" I screamed, running around the table.

In mid-punch, Ashley withheld her fist, and then released Chris' shirt, letting him fall to the floor. She was panting when she turned to look at me; I'd never seen her look so frightening. I swallowed. and took a step back as she shouldered past me.

I took a step to follow her, but Kyla grabbed my arm. Aiden kissed her quickly, and then followed his cousin out the door.

"Jesus," Kyla whispered.

We turned to watch Chris' teammates pick him off the floor, and I cringed at his red and puffy face. Blood trickled from his nose, and Brazil handed him a napkin from the table.

"That crazy fucking bitch!" Chris groaned, sitting on the chair and holding his hand to his face. He looked at me, then. "I'm sorry, Spencer. I was just kidding."

I had no words to reply. I couldn't explain what had just happened anymore than he could.

"She didn't sleep with either of them," Kyla said.

"You never know when to shut up, Jenks," Brazil said, disgusted.

Kyla pulled on my arm. "C'mon. Let's go."

She didn't waste time tugging me to her car. When she put the gear in drive, I grabbed her wrist. "Wait! Where are we going?"

"We're going to Aiden's. I don't want him to be alone with Ashley. Did you see her? shes gone off the deep end!"

"Well, I don't want to be around her, either!"

Kyla stared at me in disbelief. "There's obviously something going on with her. Don't you want to know what it is?"

"My sense of self-preservation is outweighing my curiosity at this point, Ky."

"The only thing that stopped her was your voice, Spence. She'll listen to you. You need to talk to her."

I sighed and released her wrist, falling against the back of my seat. "All right. Let's go."

We pulled into the parking lot, and Kyla slowed to a stop between Aiden's Charger and Ashley's Harley. She walked to the stairs, putting her hands on her hips with a touch of her own dramatic flare.

"C'mon, Spence!" Kyla called, motioning for me to follow.

Hesitant, I finally followed, stopping when I saw Aiden hurry down the stairs to speak quietly in Kyla's ear. He looked at me, shook his head, and then whispered to her once again..

"What?" I asked.

"Aiden doesn't…," she fidgeted, "Aiden doesn't think it's a good idea that we go in. Ashley is still pretty mad."

"You mean she doesn't think I should go in," I said. Kyla shrugged sheepishly, and then looked to Aiden .

Aiden touched my shoulder. "You didn't do anything wrong, Spencer. She just doesn't…she doesn't want to see you right now."

"If I didn't do anything wrong, then why doesn't she want to see me?"

"I'm not sure; she won't talk to me about it. I think she's embarrassed that she lost her temper in front of you."

"She lost her temper in front of the entire cafeteria! What do I have to do with it?"

"More than you think," Aiden said, dodging my eyes.

I watched them for a moment, and then pushed past them, running up the stairs. I burst through the doors to find an empty living room. The door to Ashley's' room was closed, so I knocked.

"Ashley? It's me, open up."

"Walk away, Pidge," she

called from the other side of the door.

I peeked in to see her sitting on the edge of her bed, facing the window. Toto pawed at her back, unhappy about being ignored.

"What is going on with you, Ash?" I asked. She didn't answer, so I stood beside her, crossing my arms. Her jaw was tensed, but it was no longer the frightening expression she had in the cafeteria. She seemed sad. The deep, hopeless kind.

"You're not going to talk to me about this?"

I waited, but she remained quiet. I turned for the door and she finally sighed. "You know the other day when Brazil mouthed off to me and you rushed to my defense? Well…that's what happened. I just got a little carried away."

"You were angry before Chris said anything," I said, returning to sit beside her on the bed.

She continued to stare out the window. "I meant what I said before. You need to walk away, Pidge. God knows I can't walk away from you."

I touched her arm. "You don't want me to leave."

Ashley's' jaws tensed again, and then she took me under her arm. She paused for a moment, and then kissed my forehead, pressing her cheek against my temple. "It doesn't matter how hard I try. You're going to hate me when it's all said and done."

I wrapped my arms around her. "We have to be friends. I won't take no for an answer," I quoted.

Her eyebrows pulled in, and then she cradled me to her with both arms, still staring out the window. "I watch you sleeping a lot. You always look so peaceful. I don't have that kind of quiet. I have all this anger and rage boiling inside of me—except when I watch you sleep. That's what I was doing when Parker walked in," she continued. "I was awake, and he walked in, and just stood there with this shocked look on his face. I knew what he thought, but I didn't set him straight. I didn't explain because I wanted him to think something happened. Now the whole school thinks you were with us both in the same night."

Toto nuzzled his way onto my lap, and I rubbed his ears. Ashley reached over to pet him once, and then rested her hand on mine. "I'm sorry."

I shrugged. "If he believes the gossip, it's his own fault."

"It's hard to think anything else when he sees us in bed together."

"He knows I'm staying with you. I was fully clothed for Christ's sake."

Ashley sighed. "He was probably too pissed to notice. I know you like him, Pidge. I should have explained. I owe you that much."

"It doesn't matter."

"You're not mad?" She asked, surprised.

"Is that what you're so upset about? You thought I'd be mad at you when you told me the truth?"

"You should be. If someone single-handedly sunk my reputation, I'd be a little pissed."

"You don't care about reputations. What happened to the Ashley that doesn't give a shit what anyone thinks?" I teased, nudging her.

"That was before I saw the look on your face when you heard what everyone's saying. I don't want you to get hurt because of me."

"You would never do anything to hurt me."

"I'd rather cut off my arm," she sighed.

She relaxed her cheek against my hair. I didn't have a reply, and Ashley seemed to have said everything she needed to, so we sat in silence. Once in awhile, Ashley would squeeze me tighter to her side. I gripped her shirt, not knowing how else to make her feel better other than to just let her hold me.

When the sun began to set, I heard a faint knock at the door. "Spence?" Kyla's voice sounded small on the other side of the wood.

"Come in, Ky," Ashley answered.

Kyla walked in with Aiden, and she smiled at the site of us tangled in each other's arms. "We were going to grab a bite to eat. You two feel like making a Pei Wei run?"

"Agh …Asian again , Ky? Really?" Ashley asked.

I smiled. She sounded like herself again.

Kyla noticed as well. "Yes, really. You guys coming or not?"

"I'm starving," I said.

"Of course you are, you didn't get to eat lunch," she said, frowning. She stood up, bringing me with her. "Come on. Let's get you some food."

She kept her arm around me, and didn't let go until we were in the booth of Pei Wei.

As soon as Ashley left for the bathroom, Kyla leaned in. "So? What did she say?"

"Nothing," I shrugged.

She raised an eyebrow. "You were in her room for two hours. She didn't say anything?"

"She usually doesn't when she's that mad," Aiden said.

"She had to have said something," Kyla prodded.

"She said she got a little carried away taking up for me, and that she didn't tell Parker the truth when he walked in. That's it," I said, straightening the salt and pepper.

Aiden shook his head, closing his eyes.

"What, Baby?" Kyla asked, sitting taller.

"Ashley is," he sighed, rolling his eyes. "Forget it."

Kyla wore a stubborn expression. "Oh, hell no, you can't just—,"

She cut off when Ashley sat down and swung her arm behind me. "Damn it! The food's not here yet?"

We laughed and joked until the restaurant closed, and then filed into the car for the ride home. Aiden carried Kyla up the stairs on his back, but Ashley stayed behind, tugging on my arm to keep me from following. She looked up at our friends until they disappeared behind the door, and then offered a regretful smile. "I owe you an apology for today, so I'm sorry."

"You've already apologized. It's fine."

"No, I apologized for Parker. I don't want you thinking I'm some psycho that goes around attacking people over the tiniest thing," she said, "but I owe you an apology because I didn't defend you for the right reason."

"And that would be…." I prompted.

"I lunged at him because he said he wanted to be next in line, not because he was teasing you."

"Insinuating there is a line is plenty reason for you to defend me, Ash."

"That's my point. I was pissed because I took that as him wanting to sleep with you."

After processing what Ashley meant, I grabbed the sides of her shirt and buried my head in her neck. "You know what? I don't care," I said, looking at her. "I don't care what people are saying, or that you lost your temper, or why you messed up Chris' face. The last thing I want is a bad reputation, but I'm tired of explaining our friendship to everyone. To hell with 'em."

Ashley's' eyes turned soft, and the corners of her mouth turned up. "Our friendship?" "Sometimes I wonder if you listen to me at all."

"What do you mean?"

"Let's go in. I'm tired."

I nodded, and she held me against her side until we were inside the apartment. Kyla and Aiden had already shut themselves in their bedroom, and I slipped in and out of the shower. Ashley sat with Toto outside while I dressed in my pajamas, and within half an hour, we were both in bed.

I rested my head on my arm, breathing out a long, relaxing puff of air. "Just two weeks left. What are you going to do for drama when I move back to Morgan?"

"I don't know," she said. I could see her tormented frown, even in the darkness.

"Hey," I touched her arm. "I was kidding."

I watched her for a long time, breathing, blinking, and trying to relax. She fidgeted a bit and then looked over at me. "Do you trust me, Pidge?"

"Yeah, why?"

"C'mere," she said, pulling me against her. I stiffened for a second or two before resting my head on her chest. Whatever was going on with her, she needed me near her, and I couldn't have objected even if I'd wanted to. It felt right lying next to her.


End file.
